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About David
Expertise
I've really dealt with everything that has to do with crushes and I can help in most situations. I'm in high school so I understand what goes on.

Experience
My experience is mainly through trial and error. I have also taken a mediation class, at school, and we learned how to talk to people and guide them through tough situations.

Organizations
I am really involved in the AIDS program at my school, we go around to other schools and teach the kids about how to prevent themselves from contracting HIV/AIDS. It is a really rewarding program.

Publications
I write for my school newspaper, edited the middle school one for a year and the yearbook too.

Education/Credentials
I'm in High School and have gone through a few different leadership and mediation type classes.

You are here: Experts > Teens > Teen Advice > Dealing with Crushes > HELP!!!!

Dealing with Crushes - HELP!!!!

Expert: David - 11/4/2009

Question
I know it long but I am really confused.

There is a guy (family friend) that I've liked for a long time, but he has a girlfriend. On our last dinner party, we had the opportunity to talk and he was flirting with me a lot. After that (like a week later) I texted him saying Hi!
and we got to the point where I said:
Well, you are important to me, I like you, but I don't want to ruin our friendship.
He answered:
ok, how far would you go?
I answered:
Well, could you please tell me what exactly do you mean?
He answered:
Never mind, let's forget this, we shouldn't complicate things.

Since then he's been ignoring me.

I really want to know why is he ignoring me? what did his question mean? why did he change his mind??

Thank you!

Answer
Maria,
I feel for you in because of your situation. It seems like this guy likes you, or at least wants to get into your pants. By asking "how far you would go" he was trying to see how comfortable you were both with him and with your body. I have a feeling that he said that he didn't want to complicate things because you have been, at least for now, relegated to the "friendzone"; he sees you as a friend more than anything else and doesn't want to lose that. Some people say the "friendzone" is impossible to get out of but I can tell you that it isn't impossible because I have, personally, done it before. He has been ignoring you because he is worried what you are thinking right now. He kind of went out on a limb and feels like he alienated you. He changed his mind because he is confused. It seems as though he does like you, but he just doesn't know exactly what to do right now. My advice for you is to flirt with him as much as you can, without smothering the guy, and try to make him see that you two would be good to go out together.

If you need any more advice I would be more than happy to help.

Best,
David

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