About Kimberly Expertise Hi, I have suffered through years of depression and the many disorders that
come with it. It is a very scary experience and hard at times to get through
the day. But I have now gotten to the other side of the pain and found hope
and courage and life. I want to be a person you can feel comfortable talking
to, and in talking with me that you can feel at ease knowing that I have
been there and I do understand. I want to be a friend and listen and I will
do my very best to ease the feelings you feel and help you in your journey
to a better happier life. You are not alone and I would love to be there to
help you fight.
Experience My greatest accomplishment is knowing that I have been there and today, I'm here to help others in their healing. The biggest accomplishment lies in those who write for help in so doing they are taking a huge step in their healing!
I am currently a student in Psychology, and have been certified in Crisis prevention since 2001.
Expert: Kimberly Date: 5/13/2008 Subject: Need someone to talk to
Question "Hi there. I am a young woman in her twenties who has suffered from severe, debilitating depression since as far back as I can remember. I remember having my first suicidal thought when I was still in elementary school. I think of killing myself often, but I have never been able to find the courage to go through with it.
About a year ago I got pregnant, and decided to have an abortion. I believed it was the right thing to do. I know that with my illness, I am NOT capable of caring for a child, and I just couldn't bring myself to give my child up. MY depression is so severe that I am unable to work, and am on a disability pension(not welfare). I see a psychiatrist and a counselor(have been for years) and take several different medications. But it doesn't help much. I spend most of my days locked in the house. I sleep a lot.
Anyway, a family member made a comment the other day that really hurt me. She said that all women who have abortions are "selfish whores" and "murderers", and said the only time it is acceptable is if her life or health is in danger.
I said that health is a very broad term, and can also include emotional and mental health. I brought up the fact that women like myself who suffer from depression are more prone to developing severe post-partum depression and could be a threat to ourselves or our babies.
Well, she jsut went on and on about how mental illness can be overcome, that there is medication a woman can take, that it just takes discipline and a desire to get better and blah blah. She also said that it was better the woman suffer from depression for several months or even a few years than someone lose their life.
Since then I have been feeling really down on myself. Like maybe I am a bad person for having an abortion. And maybe I am just weak and haven't tried hard enough to get better.
I have no one to talk to. I don't want to tell my therapist about this, because I am ashamed. And my family is very conservative and wouldn't understand. I have no friends. Can you help? Thank you for listening. I hope you will not judge me.
Leigh
Answer Leigh,
I am sorry #1 for how your family has treated you for aborting your child. I know that it’s very hard and it was a hard decision for you, but first and foremost this was your decision and your choice. If you felt that you could not care for your child and that it would in fact lead to more health related stresses for you, I think you in fact made the decision best for you.
This is not about your family. This is about YOU. Does your therapist know that you had the abortion? I think it’s important to talk about such a major event. Pregnancy is a very hard time for anyone, whether or not they keep that child or not. I would encourage you to talk about this with him/her. You have nothing to be ashamed of.
Also, you said that you feel like your medications aren’t helping. There are so many combinations; one has to be the right one for you. Please consider telling your therapist so they can work on a different combination that can help you.
I truly wish the best for you, and I hope that you’ll find the peace that you deserve.
