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About Patricia A. Schafer, Ph.D.
Expertise
I received my Ph.D. from Kent State,in Ohio in Counseling.I specialize in various forms of depression and Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) and forms of addictions such as substance abuse,eating disorders and gambling. My licenses are: Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor -Supervisor(LPCC-S) and Licensed Professional Chemical Dependency Counselor (LICDC) My experience includes counseling substance abusers, families of alcoholics/drug addictions, and codependency issues. I also specialize in social phobia; stress; anxieties; women`s issues; grief and adjustments to life changes. Some therapeutic techniques used are: CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy), DBT (Dialectical Behaviorial Therapy)REBT (Rational Emotive), SFT (Solution Focused) and 12-Step, etc. If you live in the Cleveland area, you can contact me at my office for an appointment at: 440-349-4521. I accept insurance and EAP programs.
Experience
Twelve years experience as a professional clinical counselor; 30 years member of Al-Anon.
Organizations
ACA, OCA, OMHCA, NBCC
Publications
Experiences of prejudice among individuals in African American and Caucasian Interracial Marriages: A Q-methodological Study (Doctoral Dissertation - December 2008;
Wilsnack and Beckman's book: Alcohol Problems in Women (1984). Alcohol use and marital violence: Female and Male Differences in reactions to alcohol(pages 260-279.
Education/Credentials
Ph.D. in Counseling - Kent State
MS in Counseling - John Carroll University
BS in Psychology - University of Pittsburgh
Awards and Honors
Previous president of NCOCA (North Central Ohio Counseling Association); previous president of Chi Sigma Iota. Two years VISTA volunteer on Navajo reservation in Inscription House and Shonto.
Past/Present Clients
confidential
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You are here: Experts > Health/Fitness > Mental Health > Dealing with Depression > depressed thinking of old girlfriend
Expert: Patricia A. Schafer, Ph.D. - 10/20/2009
Question
I know i am depressed and taking medication right now. Feeling a little better but here's my issue. Recently, found my first love, on facebook and have been conversing. Unfortunately, after 30 years of having a wonderful wife and 4 kids, i am thinking about this old girlfriend. There's no question my current family is the most important thing and this "dream" of going back is really making me sad, depressed, and unfavorably impacting my life. Not sure if it's a chemical imbalance or mid-life crisis (turned 50). Any help would be much appreciated. Thanks
Answer
Hi Mark:
You state you have a wonderful wife and 4 kids. Keep your focus on your wife and 4 kids. Every time you start to think of your old girl friend, turn your thoughts to events in your life such as when each of your 4 children were born. Or maybe a wonderful vacation with the kids or silly things your kids do. Special anniversaries with your wife - surprises she gave you, special gifts, etc. You are where you are supposed to be right now and your mind can control your thoughts. You can choose whom you want to think about.
A first love does have an impact in ones life. But, then one grow up and matures and moves on. So, keep the focus on your family and the 30 years of what you and your wife have built together.
Hope this helps.
Take care,
Dr. Pat
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