Dealing with Depression/stomach

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Question
Hi
I am 31 years old man.my height is 5'8" and weight is 72 kg. i think i am the most sensitive person that lives in past. i wand to have love and harmony every where. bur due to some personal reasons including 5 years jobless, my mind is always thinking about the past and why this happens and if it does not happens etc.i was also in love 13 years ago and still thinking about that love.   now i have some stomach problem i.e I literally belch after meal, after drinking even plain water, on an empty stomach, and acidity problem....u may please guide me what to do now thanks

Answer
Ameer,

Right now you are thinking a lot about the past; but that can change.

Thinking about the past is a waste of time because you cannot change it, nor analyze why this
happened, or that happened.  There is no answer for the past today.  This causes anxiety, you feel upset about the past, and eventually your stomach is upset.  You are thinking too much about yourself and your past.  Waste of time that can never be changed.

You can choose whether to think about the past, or you can choose to think about today and what you are doing today.  Keep your focus on you, today.  Think about what good came to you today.
Did you meet an old friend? Did you find a new restaurant, etc.  Tomorrow will take care of itself.
So, at the end of the day tomorrow, think of the good that happen. Do you like your job? Did you do something good for someone else?

How do you want your future to look like?  Bad future or good future?  So, write down some goals you would like to complete within the next 3 months.  Then make a long-term goal list; write down what you would like to be doing, and or complete, in one year?   Make them goals that can be attainable.  For example, you can write down "I would like to buy a new car."  However, you may not have the money for an expensive car.  So, you might want to write: "I would like to buy a good used car."    Your goals have to be something attainable.  

Next, you may want to see a counselor to help you focus on the present, one day at a time.  If you want to do that, look for a counselor that uses Behavioral Therapy to help you focus on the present and to think more positively, stop thinking about the past.

Gratitude can change attitude. For example, if you believe in God, thank God for giving you life and breath; for food; clothes; a job; good health.   Make a list of 5 things each day you are grateful for.  When you feel you have run out of things to write about, start to read the list over - read 5 things each night.

As for your stomach right now, you can ask the pharmacist, at your local pharmacy, to suggest something for stomach acidity and belching.  Or, you may want to go see the doctor.  Sometimes stomach acidity can actually be caused by a bacteria.

Hope these thoughts help you.

Take care,

Dr. Pat  

Dealing with Depression

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Patricia A. Schafer, Ph.D.

Expertise

I received my Ph.D. from Kent State,in Ohio in Counseling.I specialize in various forms of depression and Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) and forms of addictions such as substance abuse,eating disorders and gambling. My licenses are: Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor -Supervisor(LPCC-S) and Licensed Professional Chemical Dependency Counselor (LICDC) My experience includes counseling substance abusers, families of alcoholics/drug addictions, and codependency issues. I also specialize in social phobia; stress; anxieties; women`s issues; grief and adjustments to life changes. Some therapeutic techniques used are: CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy), DBT (Dialectical Behaviorial Therapy)REBT (Rational Emotive), SFT (Solution Focused) and 12-Step, etc. If you live in the Cleveland area, you can contact me at my office for an appointment at: 440-349-4521. I accept insurance and EAP programs.

Experience

Twelve years experience as a professional clinical counselor; 30 years member of Al-Anon.

Organizations
ACA, OCA, OMHCA, NBCC

Publications
Experiences of prejudice among individuals in African American and Caucasian Interracial Marriages: A Q-methodological Study (Doctoral Dissertation - December 2008; Wilsnack and Beckman's book: Alcohol Problems in Women (1984). Alcohol use and marital violence: Female and Male Differences in reactions to alcohol(pages 260-279.

Education/Credentials
Ph.D. in Counseling - Kent State MS in Counseling - John Carroll University BS in Psychology - University of Pittsburgh

Awards and Honors
Previous president of NCOCA (North Central Ohio Counseling Association); previous president of Chi Sigma Iota. Two years VISTA volunteer on Navajo reservation in Inscription House and Shonto.

Past/Present Clients
confidential

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