Dealing with Depression/Depression questions

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Question
Hello,
In 2013, I have been through a lot of different emotional changes,I had a daughter 6 months ago and suffered from post-partum depression,and taken Zoloft for it.I quit cold turkey,after thinking I was done with depression.
I love my daughter and I will do anything for her..that's mainly why I'm asking for help.
My husband and I have been married for a year and a half and normally we are a great couple,but lately we have been fighting lately.Normally it's over money and I feel like we are heading towards divorce very quickly.
My parents don't approve of my decisions, and that create tension.On top of that I have no friends,and no family around here.
Please help me,
Thanks

Answer
Hi Nicole,

Sitting alone with negativity surrounding you is hard to deal with when not stressed emotionally. Add post par-tum to that, along with physiological changes, the newly acquired responsibilities of motherhood, financial worries, disapproving parents, spouse arguments, loneliness, and the situation becomes even harder to deal with than it normally would be. Things that usually failed to become problematic before, suddenly are not so easily dismissed. What was once a simple unimportant consideration, now dominates the attention. These bigger-than-life problems have taken on new meaning, becoming an agitating influence on a mind that once may have seen these issues as not so difficult to deal with. Things that were not so much an issue before, now seem to be huge. This change in focus has you reaching out for help due to the sense of helplessness that these things must surely heap upon you currently.

Normally, we are not taught about the power of thought and how it influences our lives. When we have problems, help usually comes in the form of advice, whether we want that or not, it is always there, somewhere. As a result we have a tendency to look externally to ourselves for the problems that affects us, rather than searching in the most obvious place first, to our own minds and the thoughts we permit to stay there, present in our focus, unscrupulously dominating our feelings and behaviours. There is a tendency for advice-givers to talk around, or even totally ignore, this important aspect of ourselves, or to never discuss how they play such an important role within our daily lives. When we face difficulties, the power of thought is never focused on as the prime factor in the feelings we have, the behaviours that result from the thoughts we focus on, or the problems that thoughts cause us when we fail to understand this ever-present phenomenon. Thought and the power we give to it is the root of all aberrant processes! Regardless of what the current situation is, despite the personal problems we face, the answer is never external to us. The answer lies within the thoughts we permit to stay in focus, and that which we permit to wreak havoc within our lives.

Become very aware of the thoughts inside your head. Watch how they can affect your feelings or behaviours if you continue to focus on them. A thought like, "I need a drink" will have you driving to the nearest liquor store. Or a thought like, "we may be heading for a quick divorce", could find you thumbing through the phone book looking for a good lawyer. The slightest thought, if left unchecked, can blossom into a full blown "false-reality" affecting our feelings and behaviours, often in very negative and harmful ways. Those real things within our environment get replaced by the illusion that thoughts build within our consciousness, and we soon mistake the things inside our heads for the true reality which lies about us. Eating ice-cream but totally unaware of its coolness or taste, as the thoughts inside our head wash over the reality of the ice-cream with the false reality that dominates our focus at the time. This is the power of thought and it is no little thing! Thoughts are fleeting electrical impulses. They do not exist for very long in this state. They just appear and disappear at a very high rate of speed, so in essence, they do not exist, at least, they do not exist for very long, but they appear as real when we forget about their transitory state. Clinging to these electrical impulses permits them to have an effect in our lives the longer we allow them to remain in our conscious stream. The thoughts may not be real due to their fleeting state, but their affects definitely are real. They can have far reaching and devastating affect in our lives and we must become aware of their power and how they affect us. Any thought has this potential to become something other than what it should.

If you continue to permit the negative thoughts to stay within your conscious stream of awareness, the thoughts will subtly take you over and start to rule you, your feelings, your behaviours, your beliefs, and ultimately the decisions you make within your life. You need to learn how to deal with them if you are to overcome their negative impact in your life. Learn to control them rather than becoming their slave.


More information here on my Psychology Blog. Learn how to control the thoughts. Wiping thoughts. Centering within reality. Overcoming depression. Lots more.

Dealing with Depression

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Depression, anxiety, self esteem, guilt, loss, grief, spiritual uncertainty!

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Thirty years treating individual, families, at-risk-youth in counselling and psycho-therapy.

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