Question Thank you for taking my question my girlfriend is 44 and I am 47 She has two children one, a daughter is 18 years old. Her son is 19. Neither lives with us. Her daughter has been a handful to put it mildly having run away from home many many times since she was 12. Incare she has two children one, a daughter is 18 years old. Her son is 19. Neither lives with us. Her daughter has run away from home numerous times since the age of 12. She has been incarcerated in juvenile detention centers. She has been diagnosed as a sociopath. She was pregnant at 17 and has been a mom since before her 18th birthday. She literally drove my gf into the ground emotionally and financially. Her son is much better but she still carries the scares from some of his challenges growing up though he is finding his way now. Her daughter only reaches out when she wants money or something and literally she never calls without dropping a bombshell. Most recently it was to tell her mom that she is pregnant again and with the same deadbeat as the first child who doesn't hold a job. They live with his mother and neither of them will take a step towards improving their situation. Long story to say her psychiatrist she sees for her ADD recently suggested putting her on Wellbutrin for 6 months. She believes she is dealing with guilt over her children's predicaments and her recent decision to cut her daughter out of her life except in emergency. She has concerns, as do I, that Wellbutrin will effectively "numb" her and change who she is in terms of her personality. Beyond that I personally have concerns that while anti depressants are useful tools, knowing her daughter won't ever be out of her life, isn't it just going to keep masking the underlying issues she is dealing with that will always be thrown in her face as her daughter continues to reach out in the coming months, years?? Many thanks for your thoughts.
Answer I highly recommend against meds for her situation. The drugs are good for when it's a brain/chemical issue that can't be solved by other means, but if she is in fact dealing with guilt, I would encourage guilt counseling instead so she can work through the issues and remain healthy.
It is okay to feel down and out once every so often, as long as you know to reach out for the hands that will pull you back up. I can answer questions about self esteem improvement, relationship with others, depression, and sexuality. I will/cannot give medical advice without an actual examination of the person and his/her medical history, so for those issues, best to find a local specialist/doctor to be safe.
Ten years of professional and volunteer counseling, and volunteering for the Crisis Center. Born of a conflict-laiden family, I've walked through violance, addiction, abuse, and more. I survived, scarred but still strong, and I will do my best to help others do the same.
Organizations Richmond Chimo Crisis Center
Education/Credentials Interpersonal/Social Relation Specialist, University of British Colombia Socialwork, 2005.