About Sylvia Bergthold Expertise I can answer questions dealing with roommate situations including compatability, leases, placing roommate wanted ads, what you have to offer to a roommate, sharing of utilities and other services, interviewing techniques and questions, some legal aspects of housesharing, clearance information, etc.
Experience I have had roommates in my home for over 32 years and am the author of:
"SORRY, THE BOA HAS GOTTA GO!" A Roommate Survival Guide
Publications The Los Angeles Times, The HB-FV Independent, The Arizona Tribune, Lansing Michigan Rental Guide, Roommate Locator Newsletter, The Plain Dealer,, Las Vegas Sun, Apartment Lifestyles Magazine, Instyle Magazine, The Whiz.com, Cosmopolitan, Under 25, The Portsmouth Herald
Question I live in a 5 bedroom house which is leased by room. We had 4 people lined up for the house when we signed the lease, and because we have no control over the extra room, the landlord filled it before we got the chance to find another person. The girl he filled it with (Courtney) has not been taking care of the house, has been stealing food, has treated each of us with disrespect, and has been verbally abusive.
How she doesn't take care of the house: she has not cleaned a single room since she moved into the house (4 months ago), has not taken out the garbage, smokes pot and leaves ashes all over the stove and floor in the bathroom, uses the kitchen knives to do blades (pot) and puts them back with the other knives. One long weekend when the rest of us were away, we came back to cigarette butts, ashes, and pizza all over the floor. If it is mentioned to her that she doesn't contribute around the house she says she shouldn't be expected to unless someone asks her to do something specifically. (I do not think it is our responsibly to knock on her door as tell her its time to go clean the bathroom. No other house members need this to be done.) We have also tried making a cleaning schedule. She told us she is far busier then the rest of us and shouldn't be expected to clean up after herself all the time (she is a part time student, failing 2 of 3 courses due to lack of attendance, with no job).
How she has treated us with disrespect: One of my friends came over one night looking for me, and she was screaming at him "F*** you! Get the f*** out of my f***ing house you fat piece of s***! Then wrote directly on the fridge in marker "F*** you Mary! (We have all woken up to similar messages written on the fridge).
Whenever any of my us attempts to talk to her about her behavior she does not discuss the situation she simply tells us to "F*** you, your a F***ing SL**"
She invited another one of my roommates to volunteer at a children's Christmas function with her, dressing up as elves. At the event, Courtney told this roommate that she has no right to be saying Merry Christmas to anybody because she is Jewish, and proceeded to demand she remove her star of David necklace. (I am pretty sure this is illegal)
This is just a small sample of what we have been living with. We plan on filing an official complaint with the land lord. What I am wondering is if these are grounds to request she be evicted? I realize the landlord is going to be hesitant to evict her since we rent rooms, and that mean money out of his pocket, so we are currently looking for people to replace her, but we have not found anybody yet.
Answer Hi Mary
You and the other THREE roommates go to the landlord ASAP and explain this entire scenario to him. Also tell him that if he doesn't evict Courtney, ALL four of you are finding another place to live like yesterday. If he thinks one roommate leaving is hard on his pocketbook, how does he feel about FOUR walking out on him? And I am not kidding here okay? Be prepared to move if necessary.
You did not sign a lease agreement with him to live in a pigpen, breathe pot smoke, be verbally abused and threatened. And tell him you will find a replacement for Courtney immediately upon his evicting her.
You had no input in interviewing her to see if she was compatible which was an major error on the landlords part. Perhaps he just didn't realize how important it is for everyone in the household to be compatible, or he didn't care....but you make sure he is aware that she is smoking dope, is disrespectful, verbally abusive and threatening, is a slob and anything else you can think of. In fact, print out this letter to me and hand it to him.
No way should you have to put up with this type of behavior. You might also want to visit the Fair Housing Council in your city, bring the lease agreement with you and explain this mess. Ask for their advice. Maybe they can come up with more options.
Good Luck
Sincerely
Sylvia Bergthold
www.aroommatesurvivalguide.com
