Expert: James Middleton - 8/20/2008

Question
hey i am anika and im 16 years old.
i think i worry too much about everything. like 2 years ago i kept worrying if i was liked by everyone at school and if i was cool enough. then lets just say i grew out of that, but then i kept worrying about exams and results. i even once had a breakdown during the exam period because i thought i just cannot do this, even though i have been a good student throughout.

But the main problem now is the fact that i get really jealous and upset at times when i meet some girl who is really pretty, it keeps on reminding me that i am not that pretty, and then i feel sad. is this normal for a 16 year old to feel? im getting worried that i cannot keep my emotions under control and at times this freaks me out. Also when someone doesnt like me or talk to me this makes me feel really inferior and sad.

Also i keep worrying about when i go uni and everyone starts to go clubbing. because, i have quite dark underarms (which i am trying to get rid of with creams and all that) and like i am really scared that people will think i look ugly in sleeveless tops and all that..
I am constantly comparing myself to others

what do i do- i keep worrying about the past and the future...thanks so much for listening and helping.

Answer
Hey Anika,

These sorts of worries are perfectly normal at your age.  Most of the time we are able to keep them in check - but occasionally, like you, they snowball out of control.

What you need are some methods to boost your sense of self esteem. There are lots of ways to do this which ususally include doing activities and skills which we are really good at.

The other simpler, faster and more direct way are using good self hypnosis programs of which there are many on the net or you may like to look at mine at:

www.hypnosistapes-and-cds.com

If you need help choosing a program, let me know and I will try and advise you.

Play your chosen program every day until the feelings start to ease which could take up to a month or so.

Usually when we pass 19 years or so, these feelings disappear completely for most of us.

I hope this is helfpul, let me know if you need anything else.

Warm regards,

James