Dealing with Stress/Stress in school


I have been going to a school called North Hollywood High School. And in the high school, there is a subdivision known as the Highly Gifted Magnet. My parents enrolled me in the program but ever since I entered this HGM, everything around me has increasingly gotten worse. My stressed out friends fight weekly, and we all have 1~2 tests a day and about 4 hours of sleep every night. The stress has accumulated and it has gotten to the point where I go home and cry almost every day. I never go out on weekends because I need to study, and the relationship between my divorced parents has gotten worse. My mother wants me to go to a Japanese college and she keeps fighting over child custody,  whereas my father wants me to get into an elite American school. If it keeps on going like this, I fear that I may give up on school all together, or start blaming my friends and family for the stress I have now. How can I reduce the stress I have now so I can return back to normal? Thank you so much.

Hi Erika

Forgive me for being very direct with my answer, but I feel there is only one adult in your story and that is you.

If seems like your parents see you as a talented trophy rather than a developing child, and they forget the human being behind the gifted girl.

I suspect that you have some symptoms of depression.  You can get medication for that and never properly deal with the issue, so I would rather discard that.

You could also go for endless therapy and contemplate your navel and not get anywhere.  You decide whether that is an option.

Here is what I would recommend:  find a sympathetic teacher and let the teacher help you find a way out of that program because it clearly sucks the life out of you.  Does that mean you fail early in your life?  Absolutely not.  It means you listen to your heart and mind and insist on what feels right for you rather than become a puppet in a system that makes you physically unwell.  You are one of those rare people who will succeed in life, with or without this program.

I would also recommend this:

It works far better than any therapy and will help you discover and use your own inner resources - and you do not need to tell anyone about it.

You are a lovely lady and very mature for your age.  You will find a solution and this is the first serious lesson in you putting your foot down and deciding what is good for you.

Does this help?

Love and Light

Dealing with Stress

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Elsabe Smit


Stress is the result of an inner conflict or a conflict between you and the world around you. I deal with relationships (marriage, divorce, teams in business), parenting, money issues, bereavement, conflict, and major life events (serious illness, redundancy).


Trained as psychologist, highly intuitive. Uses a unique and holistic approach that focuses on removing physical and emotional pain.

Published various academic textbooks as author, co-author and editor. Published ten books on Kindle, all also available as hard copies, and eight of them available on Audible as audio-books.

Master's Degree in Industrial psychology, Master's Degree in Business Administration

Past/Present Clients
Businesses with change management, conflict management, communication and teamwork. Individuals with divorce, relationship issues, career crises, personal growth, money issues, mid-life crises.

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