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Divorce Issues/Questions
| Subject | Date Asked | Expert |
| Relationship Issue with Fiance | 2/5/2012 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: I currently have a fiance but I am having problems with her dealing with her ex spouse of 10 years. ... A: Fred. Yes, I'd say you guys need to straighten this out before you get married. There's a bit too ... | ||
| Depression from Relationship | 2/1/2012 | Kindred Beisinger penname K D Elizabeth Beisinger |
| Q: My situation is unique. I am 43 years old, divorced with three children. When I was married, my ... A: I'm sorry for what you have been through and I'm even more sorry that your situation is truly not ... | ||
| Relationship - Sinking Deep in Depression | 2/1/2012 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: Dr.Belove: My situation is unique. I am 43 years old, divorced with three children. When I was ... A: I think this was the part of your question that stopped me, " He said it was my fault, because I ... | ||
| Divorce | 1/24/2012 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: My husband and I have been married almost 17 years. We have 3 young children. Our differences have ... A: Your situation is a very unhappy one, but not an uncommon one. If I read it right, that is. I could ... | ||
| i need your help please! | 1/20/2012 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: im getting divorce i have a baby girl... and im really devastated..im trying not to be, im trying to ... A: I'm not sure what we can do but I'll be happy to talk to you. We can use Skype. The time zones will ... | ||
| i need your help please! | 1/20/2012 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: im getting divorce i have a baby girl... and im really devastated..im trying not to be, im trying to ... A: Brutal story. I'm so sorry. This is the worst pain, really. I've experienced myself more than once ... | ||
| Custody and work schedule road bumps | 1/13/2012 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: My wife and I are in the beginning stages of getting divorced. She is wanting it. We nearly have ... A: The consistency issue is tricky. It's probably true for younger kids, say under 7 or 8, but older ... | ||
| Divorce when one parent is an alcoholic | 12/20/2011 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: My biggest concern with divorcing my alcoholic (and actively drinking) husband is the safety of my ... A: You need to speak to your attorney. Usually what folks do is request a custody evaluation and that ... | ||
| relationships after divorce | 12/12/2011 | Kindred Beisinger penname K D Elizabeth Beisinger |
| Q: I have been dating this guy for 1 1/2 years. We started dating shortly after we both left the ... A: Here's my theory. Through a separation, everyone needs support. Life is in limbo, most are unsure ... | ||
| Amicable Divorce after 20 years? | 11/20/2011 | Kindred Beisinger penname K D Elizabeth Beisinger |
| Q: After 20 years of marriage, my wife and I have decided that its time to end our marriage. Neither ... A: You present a very interesting situation. First I would like to make the comment that although you ... | ||
| Breach of divorce settlement agreement | 11/15/2011 | Lee Block |
| Q: In my girlfriend's recent Florida divorce, finalized this past September, the agreement stipulated ... A: Cappy, if it stipulates that she can dispose of the property within 45 days if he does not come and ... | ||
| my dad moved out. | 11/10/2011 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: so im 11. and today my dad moved out because my parents hate eachother. my parnts are NOT divorced. ... A: I'm terribly sorry. Dealing with a divorce is like dealing with the death of someone you love. It ... | ||
| Divorce due to Facebook. | 10/24/2011 | Kindred Beisinger penname K D Elizabeth Beisinger |
| Q: First off I am a third year student embarking on my dissertation article. I am writing about a lady ... A: I believe facebook interaction is a result of an individual's circumstances and outlook on their ... | ||
| Hurt Child | 10/5/2011 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: Me and my wife have been together for 5 years now. I divorced my x wife in 2006 because she cheated ... A: This is a very unusual and unfortunate situation and I can understand why you would be challenge by ... | ||
| The new girlfriend.. | 9/27/2011 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: I have been divorced for a little over 2 years now. We have a 4 year old daughter together. I have ... A: Sounds like things are still pretty raw between you two. Your own strategy sounds solid. Your ... | ||
| Mortgage issue with my wife | 9/22/2011 | Kindred Beisinger penname K D Elizabeth Beisinger |
| Q: We are in process of divorce and we are stuck on resolving the mortgage. Our hous is in market to ... A: I'm sorry for such a delay in my response. For some reason, my questions have not been coming to my ... | ||
| How should I act and wait | 9/6/2011 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: I met a woman 9 months ago at the point of separating from her husband. We started an affair and a ... A: Yes. It's normal. Go to my web page www.drbelove.com and read the blog about affairs. It's the ... | ||
| Dealing with the x wife | 9/6/2011 | Lee Block |
| Q: I'm 23 years old and I've been with my bf for over a year now. We got engaged on April and things ... A: You definitely to hear him out and see what he has to say for himself. But, remember, you can't ... | ||
| Dealing with the x wife | 9/2/2011 | Lee Block |
| Q: I'm 23 years old and I've been with my bf for over a year now. We got engaged on April and things ... A: It is tough to deal with the ex spouse, but the best way to do that is to let her meet you. You do ... | ||
| affairs | 8/31/2011 | Rebecca |
| Q: Does a marriage last when it was born from an affair. My ex husband dated my friend off and on for ... A: Marriages last, marriages fail, now days marriage seems less sacred than back in the days when two ... | ||
| Ex Husband | 8/31/2011 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: Long story short, I was married for 12 yrs, 3 kids later. We had our problems and I know I wasn't ... A: Sounds you were driven to write it. I can barely imagine how much pain and frustration you are ... | ||
| My daughter's Sporting Events | 8/31/2011 | Lee Block |
| Q: My ex-wife is refusing to allow me to see my daughter play sports (practice and games) without her ... A: She can not legally stop you from attending anything that your daughter is involved in! You can get ... | ||
| Military Divorce | 8/30/2011 | Kindred Beisinger penname K D Elizabeth Beisinger |
| Q: My son is married to someone that is currently in listed in US Navy. They have been separated for ... A: I suggest that he simply file for divorce, if that's what he wants. If he has to go through the US ... | ||
| divorce | 8/28/2011 | Lee Block |
| Q: i want a divorce from my husbandof 62 and i am 52, i am on social security disabilty we have a 14 yr ... A: First, my advice is to get a consultation with an attorney and ask all of those questions. Alimony ... | ||
| My live-in boyfriend will not divorce | 8/21/2011 | Kindred Beisinger penname K D Elizabeth Beisinger |
| Q: I'm going to try to make this as short and clear as possible. My boyfriend whom I have been living ... A: I don't know how to say this without just coming out and saying it. He's not going to divorce his ... | ||
| Broken Compass | 8/10/2011 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: I'm separated after 8 years of marriage; she filed on Valentines Day, and am at a real loss as to ... A: That's tough. I'm not sure what to tell you. She's very hurt and feels overwhelmed and manipulated ... | ||
| Harassment from ex | 7/26/2011 | Lee Block |
| Q: I have been divorced for about 8-9 yrs. My ex wife had custody until 2007 when I was awarded ... A: Brad: She doesn't have to tell you when or if she moves, although for the sake of your child it is ... | ||
| Harassment from ex | 7/24/2011 | Lee Block |
| Q: I have been divorced for about 8-9 yrs. My ex wife had custody until 2007 when I was awarded ... A: Unfortunately you can't control your ex. All you can do is document what she is doing and keep ... | ||
| what are my options | 7/23/2011 | Lee Block |
| Q: I am currently living in Utah and this is where I got married. my husband and I are going thorough a ... A: First of all, legally he can't get married until your divorce is final. He is committing bigamy, ... | ||
| divorce | 7/15/2011 | Kindred Beisinger penname K D Elizabeth Beisinger |
| Q: my husband and i were married 16 days shy of 5 years when i found out he was cheating. i have a ... A: Although state laws vary regarding divorce and alimony, alimony is getting pretty unheard of, ... | ||
| Divorce | 7/10/2011 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: My husband and I have been back and forth for about 2 yrs we have been married 6 yrs and have 2 ... A: Boy, talk about a no-win situation. I don't see it. I feel like Solomon. His advice was "cut the ... | ||
| my mother needs help... | 7/1/2011 | Lee Block |
| Q: my question is for my mother. She has been married, unhappily, to her husband for almost 17 years. ... A: Sorry it has taken me so long to answer, but I was out of town. Everything they own together or ... | ||
| Harassment after divorce | 6/27/2011 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: My husband and I have been married for a year now. Like clockwork she calls every monday after we ... A: You have two main strategies. First of all, you may need to end up challenging their custody. So ... | ||
| Harassment after divorce | 6/26/2011 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: My husband and I have been married for a year now. Like clockwork she calls every monday after we ... A: The emotional divorce is usually more complex than the legal one. I'd need to hear more, but ... | ||
| Husband won't get a job | 6/25/2011 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: I have been married for 7 years, with my husband for 10. When we first got together he worked a 9 ... A: This is tough. All I can tell you is what is coming. A huge storm. You are going to have this ... | ||
| BF living with "soon to be" ex wife | 6/23/2011 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
| Q: Some background 1st, I guess would be helpful. I'm 25, my BF is 41 & his "soon to be" ex wife is ... A: Well, first of all, I have to tell you that in my clinical experience of a few decades, maybe 20 ... | ||
| Premarital checking/saving accounts | 6/23/2011 | Kindred Beisinger penname K D Elizabeth Beisinger |
| Q: My wife and I are seriously considering divorce. I have had two separate accounts in my name since ... A: Let me give an example that may clarify what I'm trying to say. First if there are no kids, no ... | ||
| Taking vacations with children | 6/23/2011 | Kindred Beisinger penname K D Elizabeth Beisinger |
| Q: I was divorced in 2009 in Illinois and I have custody of my children. We do not have strict ... A: Let me begin this answer with your closing statement. Ultimately the decision is in the hands of ... | ||
| Re: Violation of divorce decree | 6/23/2011 | Lee Block |
| Q: One of the terms of my divorce decree was for ex-spouse to assume home mortgage which is currently ... A: You can re-marry, as one thing has nothing to do with the other. Of course, your ex could say that ... | ||
| I don't know where he is...Help, please. | 6/23/2011 | Kindred Beisinger penname K D Elizabeth Beisinger |
| Q: My husband and I were married 6 years ago and he abandoned us. He just left and never came back. I ... A: I am so sorry for your situation. This definitely will require an attorney. There are ways to ... | ||
Divorce Issues
Answers by Expert:
Philip Belove, Ed.D.
Top Expert on this page
Expertise
Divorce is the beginning of a life review process. For many people, it`is the first intentional decision they make about their lives. The transition into the next stage of life is difficult at first, but it gets easier. The questions I can help you with: What happened? How do I take care of our children? How do I get over my anger? How do I plan a future for myself?
Experience
I am Philip Belove, psychologist and coach. My specialty is helping people do their midlife transformation work, a psychological project that creates a foundation for happy and satisfying second half of life.
Midlife Work, because it involves so much careful attention to inner truth, is notoriously stressful on marriages and on dating relationships.
The challenges of the midlife project are echoed in the typical questions asked me as a dating-at-midlife expert:
?Learning to reconcile what you say with what you do. This challenge is echoed in questions like: Why does he say this when he does that? What is really happening?
?Learning to create your own dreams instead of being the victim of someone else's. This challenged is echoed in questions like these: How do I say that I don't want to xyz? I've been lying about some things and what should I do now?
?Learning to live a life that suits you. This challenge produces questions like Is what I'm doing normal? What if my kids think I'm crazy? How can I say that this is starting to bother me?
A person doing Midlife Transformation Work needs to develop 1) A Working Vision, 2) Skills and Strategies to realize that vision, and 3) External sources of support for the project. My role for people is to be part of the support system. I help people clarify their visions, develop the strategies and skills they need, and I help them review their progress.
Education/Credentials
M.A. Counseling Psychology
Ed.D. Counsulting Psychology (Family Therapy)
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