AboutPhilip Belove, Ed.D. Expertise Divorce is the beginning of a life review process. For many people, it`is the first intentional decision they make about their lives. The transition into the next stage of life is difficult at first, but it gets easier. The questions I can help you with: What happened? How do I take care of our children? How do I get over my anger? How do I plan a future for myself?
Experience I am Philip Belove, psychologist and coach. My specialty is helping people do their midlife transformation work, a psychological project that creates a foundation for happy and satisfying second half of life.
Midlife Work, because it involves so much careful attention to inner truth, is notoriously stressful on marriages and on dating relationships.
The challenges of the midlife project are echoed in the typical questions asked me as a dating-at-midlife expert:
?Learning to reconcile what you say with what you do. This challenge is echoed in questions like: Why does he say this when he does that? What is really happening?
?Learning to create your own dreams instead of being the victim of someone else's. This challenged is echoed in questions like these: How do I say that I don't want to xyz? I've been lying about some things and what should I do now?
?Learning to live a life that suits you. This challenge produces questions like Is what I'm doing normal? What if my kids think I'm crazy? How can I say that this is starting to bother me?
A person doing Midlife Transformation Work needs to develop 1) A Working Vision, 2) Skills and Strategies to realize that vision, and 3) External sources of support for the project. My role for people is to be part of the support system. I help people clarify their visions, develop the strategies and skills they need, and I help them review their progress.
Education/Credentials M.A. Counseling Psychology
Ed.D. Counsulting Psychology (Family Therapy)
Question QUESTION: You recently responded to my very long and all over the place question that I titled Parental Alienation. You were extremely helpful. I replied that I would be interested in working with you--but I am not sure if I took the appropriate channels when responding. I definitely feel I would benefit from counseling.
Thanks,
Rae
ANSWER: Hi. Thank you. I thought I had responded to your response earlier in the week. I'm in Montreal, but live in New England. Sometimes when I travel spam filters catch stuff. Let's try again.
Try these two addresses, either one: drbelove@datingatmidlife.com
or belove@sover.net
Then let's arrange for a telephone conversation and work out the details. Thank you again.
Philip
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QUESTION: Hi--I'm asking the same question I just wrote to your e-mail. Is working with you free--or is AllExperts a site to get paying clients? Sorry to be so blunt, but I am not able to pay for counseling at this point.
Thanks,
Rae
Answer Bluntness is good. Candor is good. I'm sure it was difficult for you speak up.
Here is how it works for me: I answer questions and follow up questions on all experts for free. I work this site because I learn a lot. I get a very broad sense of the kinds of problems people have, much broader than I would get working solely as a private practitioner. My contributions to this site have greatly added to my expertise. It has forced me to be extremely clear about many of the things I come to understand about how relationships work. I've heard a wealth of stories, some 2000 questions (I think). There are patterns that one starts to see after the first thousand cases. Allexperts is not a site designed to produce paying clients and that is far from the main reason I participate. At the same time, I am an expert and I get paid for my expertise. At some point some people transition to a paid relationship with me. Some don't. Often they seek counseling locally. Often they don't have insurance for counseling and my services cost about half of what counseling locally would cost. I'm semi-retired, I don't maintain an office anymore and we like to travel, so it works out.
Having said all that, if you can't pay for counseling either work out a greatly reduced fee arrangement with me -- you might find you are more comfortable paying something, even something small, than paying nothing -- it actually does work that way some times -- or accept a free phone call. Either way is fine.
Again, contact me directly at drbelove@datingatmidlife.com
