AboutBecky Whetstone, Ph.D. aka Doctor Becky Expertise I can answer questions regarding marriage and family concerning marital crisis, separating, Managed Separations, deciding to divorce, the divorce process and divorce therapy, and post divorce issues. I am a psychological and mental health specialist, and not an attorney, so unfortunately I wouldn't be able to answer your legal questions -- but I look forward to any questions regarding relationship health or deciding to separate of divorce – including those about children.
Experience I am a Marriage and family Therapist and work with couples and families in marital crisis and/or considering divorce every day. I help them make the wisest possible decision for them, and help them put their marriage on track or help ease them through divorce.
Organizations American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists
Texas Association of Marriage & Family Therapists
San Antonio Association of Marriage & Family Therapists
Publications San Antonio Express-News
North San Antonio Times
Education/Credentials M.A. and Ph.D. in Marriage & Family Therapy
BA in Journalism
Licensed Professional Counselor
Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist
Question I have been married to my husband for 6 months and we have been separated for 3 months. He is very controlling and it has gotten so bad that I have moved back home with my mother. We have tried going to marriage counseling but that did not help. I am tried of being trapped in this marriage. I don't know what to do. Can you please help me?
Answer Dear Kearston,
I am so sorry that you are going through a bad time when this time so soon after your marriage ought to be a happy one. It does sound like your husband is too immature to have a healthy relationship at this time, and although I am sad to say it, I want you to know that it is OK to get a divorce so soon after a marriage. Some people just don't do well once they are married ... it actually can bring about the "dark side" in many. You say this man is controlling, and that is not good. The chances of him changing without being highly motivated are zero. It is best to cut your losses before it becomes even more difficult to leave -- like if you had children together.
If I were you I would call your local family violence center and request counseling. They will help you understand what is going on so that you can make a clear decision. Counseling at such places if free of charge, and the quality of the therapy is excellent. You need to do this for yourself.
