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Divorce Issues/Future of Marriage in United States??...


Every single day when I check the news and tabloids, more and more and more couples are getting divorced. Regardless of whether they had kids or not. If they were even married in the first place.

As you say, marriage is one of the formats of relationships. But even long term serious relationships where people live together without marriage for 20-30 years, those are breaking up daily too regardless of whether they have kids or not.

We live in a world of social networks, smartphones, text messaging, instant messaging, video chat software, dating sites, sex/affair sites like Ashley Madison, internet pornography/pictures/movies available all over your phone/computer, strip clubs, porn stars and strippers coming to your house for dances, open relationships, open marriages, workplace/school romances/flirting, casual sex, frequent business trips to other destinations, prostitutes, escorts, bisexuality, threesomes, orgies, BDSM, wild sex, and even if your neighbors/friends/family/colleagues see cheating happening, no one ever blabs to no one else like in the old days, because it's really no one's business.

This makes it super duper easy to cheat nowadays and leads to a lot of marriage breakdowns.

On the other hand, many divorces are also caused by financial problems. The housing market crashes every few years, and many people are graduating with hundreds of thousands of dollars of student loan debt that they have to pay back. Having a child is also hundreds of thousands of dollars. This leads to people divorcing, or hesitant to marry at all or have children/adopt at all in the first place.

Less and less people attend church, also many older adults marriages are breaking down at 60, 70, 80 years old, so there are less and less elders and priests demanding the youth marry as was the case in the past. Societal stigma of being divorced or never married or being a single mom/dad is obliterated in the United States now.

With the boom of dating sites, people are going on dates and having sex with different people every night and never calling them again, that they would never have rejected had it been real life or if they didn't have as many options.

Drinks, drugs, smoking, this is all open everywhere, and young teens are experimenting with this stuff, having casual sex, and pregnancies and abortions at young ages.

All of these factors lead to this kind of stuff.

This isn't just men rejecting marriage or sleeping around. I would say it's an equal amount of women being like this too, or at least very close in percentage.

This trend was mainly in United States, England, Australia, and Europe...but has now slowly started spilling over to Asian/Middle Eastern/African strict religious cultures as well (most people there are still married because being single is generally unheard of in those cultures, but the divorce rate there has spiked dramatically and many are on their 2nd marriage).

Are most people cynical about true love these days?

The celebrity divorce rate is high...but even for regular normal daily people it seems sky high too.

What do you see as the future for marriage, living together, divorces, and relationships? Even from 5 years ago in 2010, the year 2015 is dramatically different and the dating "rules" don't even work any more.

Yes most people still get married daily...even eternal bachelor George Clooney did...but it is much different now. At the very least, no one is a virgin on their wedding night.

What do you predict as a future outcome? Do you feel marriage will become obsolete one day? Do you feel society structure will collapse 50 years from now, if no one gets married?

What do you see life and the dating scene (in terms of marriage, commitments etc) being different in 5 years, 10 years, 15, 20, 25, 30, and 50 years from now? How are our grandchildren's lives going to be different than ours? What about the rest of the world outside Western cultures?

I'm interested in hearing your honest thoughts.


Dear Heather,

As a minister who failed miserably in relationships, before following Messiah, I have given this subject some serious thought.  I believe giving the government authority over what should have remained a religious or spiritual matter has had a horrible effect on marriage.  Marriage licenses are really quite recent, historically speaking and were started in this country over interracial marriage.  Once a society bows to the idea a license or permit is required to fulfill what our Creator has ordained, the foundation is divided, weakened and will ultimately collapse.  Now, with that being said, this latest Supreme Court decision for gay marriage along with all the perversion you mentioned in your question, I see a very bleak future for the next generations regarding committed relationships as sanctioned by the government.

We are unfortunately, an instant gratification society, and sadly that even includes sex.  This may sound like the prudish rantings of an old woman, but . . . Back in my day of fornication (casual sex) we had the sense to be ashamed and not make it all a public matter.  I did have a social life after a divorce was filed but not yet final, but never had an affair while married and didn't have any friends who did, at least that I knew about.  Sex is entirely too open and casual, now, and that is never good for a society.  Sex is treated with little more regard than a handshake!  And handshakes mean absolutely nothing now.  When the people lack integrity, a society will fail.

As for the other factor that I believe is beneath depravity is the self-love or narcissism with a lack of conscience.  Many people simply do not care who they hurt as long as they get what they want.  That is destructive in relationships and it's becoming rampant.  Many relationships that I see now, it's quite obvious that there is a taker and an emotionally insecure giver . . .  I do have some friends with very loving, solid relationship, but they are certainly not the norm in our current society.

As for what's coming . . . I would recommend folks get seriously back to what worked for centuries.  Have a formal religious ceremony, no gov't license, and realize the vows made are not just to each other, but before our Creator.  Those who truly make a commitment to G-d with another human being are the only ones who will have a secure relationship and that will take both parties . . . which doesn't always happen, but G-d has always preserved a remnant.

As for the rest of the world outside of American/European culture, America and Europe are trying very hard to influence the rest of the world.  I take that as a power play of "misery loves company."  The powers that be know the power of commitment to G-d and the family is what is the source of strength of a society.  That is so clear in struggling and developing nations.  Those people are committed to their families and work hard!  

There is an all out offensive assault on marriage and family because it is the bedrock of an autonomous society.  I do everything in my power to sound the warning, but offer encouragement that G-d will bless those who live for Him.

I wish you well and invite you to visit my website.

Kind Regards,
KD Liz  

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Kindred Beisinger penname K D Elizabeth Beisinger


I can answer general questions regarding separation, property, and some custody questions. I cannot answer legal questions or specific questions pertaining to individual states and counties. I can offer support through the pending time, as well as offering assistance and ideas as you move on as a single individual. I can tell you how to avoid repeat pitfalls and help you learn to leave old baggage out of new relationships. I can help you work through the contemplative time of "what if" and "if only." I am able to offer advice in dealing with unnecessary guilt, undeserved judgment, and share insight as to discerning between concerned friends, family and coworkers and nosey gossips.


I have been divorced more than once and am now married to my soulmate. We are living the exact life we both wanted to build 30 years ago, long before we ever met. Well actually it's better than I had dared hope.

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