Expert: Equality in Marriage Institute - 1/14/2005

Question
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First, Thanks for the info about the auto and taxes.  I guess I am a worry ward.  I have put this in my decree.  I guess the trial will tell.  

My STBXwife will not arbitrate.  I am the petitioner of the divorce.  She is the respondent.  She first wanted us to pay for her lawyer, I rejected it.  She has a job, and has her own property.(house) She is allowing her daughter to live in it free, and has the majority of our 5 years of marriage.  She has cancelled our first deposition.  My lawyer and I have rescheduled the deposition on Feb 4.    If she cancel out on the second one, what will happen?

A year ago last October I refinanced my house and paid off debt.  We were married.  I paid off debts she had in her name before our marriage. (non-marital debt)  She did not want to refiance her property because she wanted her daughter to buy the house when she was able.  Well I was gulable and refianced over $5000 debt of hers because she would not make the bills and putting my credit, I thought to a shame.  Well my question is I am asking for this amount back in my decree, DO YOU THINK I STAND A CHANCE?  I put her name on the house, when I refinanced the house I live in now.  Let me further explain, this house was my house I brought into the marriage. We lived in the house while we were married. I later found out,my name is not on her house. she was suppose to of put my name on her property, but didn't.  I live in Missouri if that will help.  My lawyer thinks she is a coniving woman and it is only fair if she gives me this back or 1/2 of the equity of her house.  I am only asking this.  Since I refinanced the house, my equity has deminished.  Her's well we cannot get an apprasial from her.  Hopefully the judge will see in my favor Feb. 23.  What do you think?

Answer
Dear RW,

Unfortunately I am not a lawyer so I cannot give you an exact answer. What I can recommend is that you and your attorney have a "game plan" before you walk into court. Play out different scenarios. What is it that she wants? How can you meet both of your needs. Know that appealing a divorce decision is very costly so you knowing in advance on how it will "play-out" is valuable. Soemtimes putting yourself in her position of being the divorcee and not the divorcer- how would you get back at the other spouse? What you want and start from there.

Sorry I couldn't be more helpful.