AboutChardonnay Nicole Thomas Expertise I am someone who is highly experienced in the fields of Domestic Violence and Abusive
Relationships. I have been in my share of abusive relationships and I have also studied this field. I feel that it really takes someone who has been there and been abused to really understand what other women go through. I have been in unstable relationships that involved physical, mental, emotional, psychological, and verbal abuse. At that time, I felt as if there was no way out, but there is. I didn't think that I could make it, but I did, I didn't think that I could be strong, but I was. There were times when I was constantly being put down and my self-esteem was lowered. I know that you do not have a good feeling about yourself when someone who claims to love and care about you tells you that you are worth nothing and will never be anything out of life. I had to get away from that. I wanted my life to be positive, and now it seems to be. I still have days when I think about what I've been through and I feel melancholy, but I know that I'm okay now. I know now that I am strong and that I can make it through anything. I no longer allow people to disrespect and mistreat me, that doesn't sit well with me now. My standards of how I should be treated are much higher than they used to be. I feel that women especially, should always aim for the best, and never, ever settle for less than you deserve, because if you do, then you get what you settle for. I'm here to offer my expert advice to women who have experienced domestic violence and other forms of abuse throughout relationships. Remember, there is hope, so don't give up on yourself;
BE CONFIDENT and BE STRONG.
Experience I have been in several abusive and unhealthy relationships that have given me the life experience that I have today. I am no longer ashamed to share my views and personal stories on how I survived domestic violence. I persevered through so many negative situations in my life, including abusive relationships, by having faith, and using the strength that God gave me. I learned a long time ago that life is not fair, and there is nothing that anyone can do about that; but we only have one life, so therefore we need to live it the best way that we know how. If people only realized how little time we do actually have here on this Earth, many people would not take so many things for granted. Tomorrow is not promised, but I know that if I stay on the right path towards life, everything will turn out okay. When I look back on my past, it's the good things that give me a more positive outlook on life; different times in my life where I was doing different things/activities. Some of my credentials and greatest accomplishments are throughout Dance and Music. For almost ten years I was a classical dancer. I excelled in Ballet, Jazz, and Pointe, but Ballet is my first love and always will be. I received awards, trophies, and numerous certificates throughout my years in dance. I also used to participate in an Orchestra where I played the violin. I received many certificates, awards, and medals throughout my time playing. I have also made The National Dean's List for the year's 2001-2002, and 2002-2003; as well as The National Scholars Honor Society in 2003. Not only that, I have volunteered with the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV) in the past, and will continue to do so in the future.
Organizations American Psychological Association—APA;
American Psychology-Law Society—AP-LS;
House Rabbit Society—HRS;
International Association for Correctional and Forensic Psychology—IACFP;
National Coalition Against Domestic Violence—NCADV;
North Georgia House Rabbit Society—NGHR
Education/Credentials Bachelor of Science Degree in Psychology, Concentration: Psychology Applied to the Workplace, Walden University, Expected: 2010
Awards and Honors Hope Scholarship Recipient, 2005;
The National Scholar's Honor Society, Inducted 2003;
National Dean's List, 2001-2002; 2003-2004;
Georgia Music Educator's Association, Band-Orchestra, 1991-1992; 1992-1993;
Conference Presenter-Clayton State University and The National Archives' Civic Engagement Student Research Conference, Title of Presentation: "North to the Future: The Candidates, Highlights, Factors, and Essential Outcome of the 2008 Alaska U.S. Senate Race"
Question How long will my sister deny to authorities that she is being both physically and verbally abused, yet be willing to tell us what he is doing then deny it to anyone else? Meanwhile when we try to help you she says we are meddlesome, and crazy trying to break up her family. Do we need to tape the conversations or just leave her to her own way of not dealing with it.
Answer Carol,
I do think that your sister needs to deal with this in her own way. Of course, as her sister, you should try to encourage her to leave her abuser, but if she chooses to continue to allow him to treat her that way, what can you do? Some people have to learn things the hard way and get hurt and heartbroken in the process. Sometimes, women who continue to stay in abusive relationships are severely injured or even worse, they die at the hands of the their partner. If I were you, I would let my sister know that I am here for her, but that she needs to leave and stop allowing this man to treat her like garbage that he can kick around when he feels like it. Ultimately, you are stressing yourself out by having to worry about her all the time. In the end, if she chooses to stay with him and he keeps abusing her, you and your sister may have to forgo your relationship, but I am hoping that your sister will eventually listen to you and to herself when she become rational, and see that her life does not have to be filled with abuse and pain and that by leaving, she is not only taking stand for her life, but for others as well. If she does not want you or others meddling, then if she is going to stay with this creep, she needs to not discuss their relationship. I would not go so far as to tape conversations, she can leave if she wants, this is an ignorant choice that she is making, so let the chips fall where they may. We are the master's of our own fate. I wish you well.
All My Best,
Chardonnay Nicole Thomas
AllExperts.com
