Dream Interpretation/The Spider in the Vial and the Invisible Author
My dream, to the best of my memory, was one of the weirdest animal-filled dreams I’ve had in a long, time.
I was the “mother” it seemed of a very tiny creature. I kept it in a tiny vial/vessel that could, if so desired, be worn as a necklace. At first I thought the creature looked humanoid, but my first real look at it revealed it to be the size and shape of a baby spider. I was suddenly worried if it had sufficient air, if all was prepared properly. Then I realized it was not alone in the vial. Nope, there was a dangling ball of a food source for my translucent creature. Furthermore, there appeared another creature—more apparition than alive. It was its “teacher” and seemed to teach it 1) how to get to the food source and 2) how to avoid predators via trial and error. It could change forms, once becoming a wisp of a rabbit, as if a spirit shifter. In this form it chased the poor creature in the vial until the creature learned to avoid it. It was “teaching” it. Then it changed forms again and split into two spirit shifters. The one stayed in rabbit form, the other as a predator of the rabbit. And this also taught it two things: 1) how to kill, 2) and that life is full of cruelty. I did not approve of these teaching methods, because I worried if they were safe. But I realized I could do nothing for my creature, for it had to learn on its own. It was not yet ready, and the world was not yet safe. So it must stay in its tiny glass womb, in it spiritual land, until it grew.
I was gripped with terrible speculations. “What if the child died? What if the vial broke before the maturation was done?” I thought of all the creatures that could squash or kill it without thought. I wondered if even I could love the creature when it seemed so far from human.
But then I made the conscious decision to leave it for a while. I could do nothing projecting my worries. All would happen in due time. I left it hanging above my bed.
Then comes another weird thing. I walked outside and straight into an “artist talk” with an author. I realized that the author was one of my favorites and that I should have many questions for him. But I could think of none off the top of my head and didn’t have time to drive back to the house or walk back to the dorm. So instead I merely listened to the questions and answers of others and tried not to seem out of place. After the talks, I told the author that I very much enjoyed his writing, and wondered if he would be teaching a workshop anytime soon. He seemed annoyed and scoffed at the idea of “teaching” someone to write. You either had it or you didn’t, he seemed to suggest. I wondered where he got his inspiration from, but did not ask my grumpy author any more. But as I walked out of the room, I was no longer with me, but the author. I traveled through his eyes and saw a memory, a beginning. He was driving fast and recklessly through a dark street and came across a wolf. He had the choice to stop or to accelerate and chose to floor the gas. The vehicle suffered very little damage, which seemed to disappoint him. He wanted to die or to at least be injured by the collision, wanted to feel something.
But the wolf, the poor white wolf, was bloodied and battered and very clearly gnarled by the crash. It had been dragged a few yards before detaching, and its viscera lay a length of the road.
The author drove a ways until his gas ran out. He sat on a bench and was soon surrounded by mournful howls. He looked up, unafraid, to see a much thinner and younger wolf/coyote mix.
“You killed him…why have you killed him?” He growled, “He (the dead wolf) would kill you for harming him…if only he were still here.”
The coyote mix seemed not very bright, and then began to speculate that the wolf may return from the dead to avenge himself, but this he did not believe even to himself.
The author grew weary of the mutt's chattering, and instead distracted the coyote mix with greed and pride—with the idea of power now that the alpha was dead. “Don’t you see the opportunity? What you can do with this?” And the moment the coyote mix made the mental decision to kill the alpha if he did in fact return, was the moment that the coyote lost the consciousness of the author’s presence. The author was then essentially invisible, an outside force.
I hope you can forgive me for taking so long to reply to your dream. it wasn't my intention to take this long, other bits of my life often get in the way! Lol.
I have to say, you write very well! Your dream was effortless to read and it created a really clear image in my mind of your dream, which helps quite a bit. I wonder if you are a writer yourself???
At the start of the dream, you said you were the mother of a tiny creature. Anything to do with pregnancy, birth, having a child, being a mother, etc, in a dream is often to do with something you are creating or a personal project or something new in your life. For example, if you are indeed a writer, then the dream might well be about this.
The way you described your "baby" in your dream is likely to be a real metaphor for how you are thinking about this new project or how it is progressing in your life. The creature was tiny and very fragile. Perhaps you have just begun to think about a new undertaking and it is only at its infancy? Perhaps you are not very confident about the undertaking - hence the fragile nature of the creature. Alternativel, it might be about something you have been thinking about for a long time, but it hasn't progressed very far. So in this way, it might not be such a new thing in your life.
The "teaching" that went on in the little vile is interesting and it might be about how you are preparing yourself mentally for something which is going on in your life. The thing that struck me too, was your helplessness to help or have any say in how your offspring was cared for. You also disagreed with the teaching methods because of the potential harm, but felt unable to do anything about it. Is there something in your life where you feel helpless? Or where you disagree with something that's happening around you? Perhaps you have even removed yourself from the situation or removed yourself from stress for a while??? It might even be something that is going on internally for you?
The second part of the dream is also about teaching and learning. You wanted to learn from the author, but felt unprepared, out of place, and somewhat belittled when he scoffed at you. All in all, there seems to be some issue of a lack of self confidence in your life or maybe you have a lot of self doubts about something you want to do??
The next part of the dream is where you become the writer and are driving wrecklessly. Driving in dreams is often to do with the way we are travelling through life. It is worrying that the author was driving wrecklessly and wanted to do damage to himself. I'm not sure if this refers to dark thoughts you might have been having? It is difficult to say. I would really appreciate some clarification here. It is concerning that he wanted to "die". Maybe this isn't as dramatic as it sounds, but I just wanted to check and make sure you were ok.
The bit where he wanted to die might be more symbolic of wanting to kill the "author within you" or the creator within you but not being able to??? I'm not sure why you might want to destroy the creative side of you so I'm not really 100% certain of this part of my interpretation. Is there some part of you that you don't like or wish wasn't part of your life? If so, perhaps this is what this part of the dream is about.
Not only did this author want to die, but he killed the wolf in the process. Wolves can often represent your inner guide or teacher (again that theme of teaching in your dream). A wolf is often symbolic of a spiritual teacher as well, and this theme of spirituality featured also in that first part of your dream. So I am thinking this dream is also about your own spiritual side, whatever that might be.
The author kept driving until he ran out of gas and then he sat on a bench. So I wonder if you are feeling totally exhausted at the moment, or maybe you have come to the end of the road on something and you are now stopping or maybe you even feel unable to go on?
The part where the coyote mix decided to kill the alpha male if he returned sounds like there has been some kind of revelation or realisation in your life. Have you made any life changing decisions lately? Have you made a decision to act differently or do things differently? Have you hit rock bottom in some part of your life? Maybe you have come out of it a different person? I'm really not sure what this part of the dream represents. It would really help to get some feedback from you on what is going on in your life and whether anything I have said so far has meant something to you?
If you have made some decision to leave some part of your life behind or be a different person, or something like that, it might not be the right thing for you. The reason for this is that in the dream, you said the coyote wasn't very bright, and that the author appealed to the coyote's selfish greedy side. All of these are not good traits. Again, I am not certain of your particular situation, but it can be really hard to keep on doing what is right in the world, particularly if you are an emotional and spiritual person, it can be very painful to continually face up to things that you feel are not right because it feels like you are continually swimming against the tide. It can be very draining emotionally and spiritually and physically.
If you do feel like this, please don't give up and don't give in because the world needs more people to stand up for what is right.
There are a lot of things I haven't addressed in your dream. I haven't talked about the symbolism of the animals at all in your dream, so if there was something that you really wanted more insight into, please let me know. It would be really helpful to get some feedback from you too as this might help me fit the pieces of this dream together. Obviously you have been doing a lot of thinking lately about something. I am sure we can can figure out exactly what this dream is all about together.
In the meantime, please take care of yourself.