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Dream Interpretation/Hurting family members in my dreams


I keep having dreams where I want to hurt family members like my mother with my hands. There are other family members involved in the dreams as well, but even though I know they love me I want to hurt them too. The thing is although I try to inflict pain on them, I am always defeated. What do you think this means?

Hello Shandell,

It sounds like this dream could be about conflict that you might be having with your family at the moment.  You said that even though you try to inflict pain on them, you are always defeated.  So in real life, it sounds like you are feeling frustrated with the conflict for one reason or another.  I imagine that you feel hurt in some way, but feel unable to convey how you feel to your family.  You might feel that they don't or won't understand how you feel.   

You also said that even though you know your family loves you, you still wanted to hurt them.  So this is pointing to some kind of paradox or contradiction in how you are dealing with this conflict.  For example, even though you know your family love you, and you know that hurting them is wrong or you really don't want to hurt them, your actions and perhaps anger, is saying otherwise.

So putting this together, you want to show your family how you feel about something, but the way you are going about it is not working and is infact making things worse and making it more difficult for your family to see your point of view.

If this interpretation rings true for you, then perhaps it might be time to take a step back from the conflict and try to diffuse the situation.  Obviously there has been a lot of things said that perhaps have caused hurt on both sides and maybe the original problem has been totally lost in all that?  The important thing is to try to relax and stay calm, try to be more objective about the whole thing and try to see things from an outsider's point of view.  What would a complete stranger think of what is going on in your family?  How would a complete stranger react if your actions and words were directed at them?  Try to avoid any conflict with your family for a week or so until things really calm down.  THEN have a heart to heart with them and explain how you feel in a CALM way without directing blame.  Then, when they respond, even if it is in an angry way, really listen to what they are saying and try to understand their point of view.  Don't interject.  If you disagree, take time before responding.  Try to compromise.  You might need to take another week before responding.  Don't try to rush things, there is plenty of time.  You might miss out on something now, but it might be worth it in the long run if you can improve your family life and gain more trust.

Even if the outcome of your heart to heart doesn't quite work out the way you want it to, it is important for you to find some way of dealing with it that does not again escalate that family conflict because your dream already shows that this will not work in your favour.

I hope this has helped in some way.  If it doesn't make sense to you, then I might need more detail about oen of your dreams. Let me know, I am sure we can get to the bottom of it.  

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I view each dream as a metaphor for what you are experiencing in your life. My goal is to guide you into discovering the meaning of your own dreams by explaining the logic behind dream symbols, posing some guiding questions for you to think about, and presenting some possible scenarios as to what your dream could relate to. I believe that dreams reflect our true thoughts and feelings about our life and can therefore help to clarify where we should direct our life in the future.

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