English as a Second Language/word choice

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Question
1. GBK, Inc. confirmed the appointment to C.E.O of Canadian business leader Spencer McGregor.
About 500 visitors to the water park were injured in the dust explosion and some of them suffered extensive burns in the accident.


(1.)   In the first sentence, may I say also, “GBK, Inc confirmed that Canadian business leader Spencer McGregor has been appointed the C.E.O.”?
(2.)   What is another way to say “suffered extensive burns”?  “Suffered serious burns”?


2. Women are only admitted into/to this club.
The latest version of the software is now released.


(1.)    In the first sentence, does it mean the same if I say, “Only women are admitted into/to this club’?
(2.)   In the second, can I substitute “version” for “edition”? What is the difference?


3. I estimate the orders I have placed order to value more than $25,000.

Our policy is to stock items at the prices or as close as we can, as other office supply companies in the area.

(1.)    In the first sentence, may I say also, “I estimate that the orders I have placed are worth more than $25,000”?
(2.)    In the second. What can be taken in place of “stock items”?


4. Can I ask you all please be prompt for all appointments and keep to the schedule?

I’d like to say “many thanks” to you and all the staff for making our conference at the Maybridge Center such a great success. Many delegates mentioned what a fantastic  venue the Maybridge Center is, with excellent facilities and wonderful catering.



(1.)    What can taken in place of “prompt” and “keep to the schedule”?
“On time” and “follow the schedule”?

(2.)    In the second, what can be taken in place of “delegates” and “catering”?
“Representatives” and “food and drinks”?


5. Local residents in the town of Brookside gathered to protest against for a new fast food restaurant and gas station. They feel it is unsuited to the neighborhood and worried about the negative effects on their property values.

What can be taken in place of “unsuited” and “their property values”?

“Unsuitable” and “their house prices”?

Answer
1. GBK, Inc. confirmed the appointment to C.E.O of Canadian business leader Spencer McGregor.
About 500 visitors to the water park were injured in the dust explosion and some of them suffered extensive burns in the accident.


(1.)   In the first sentence, may I say also, “GBK, Inc confirmed that Canadian business leader Spencer McGregor has been appointed the C.E.O.”? yes
(2.)   What is another way to say “suffered extensive burns”?  “Suffered serious burns”? no, extensive means that the burns covered large areas, serious burns may indicate the severity of the burns.
I'd stick to "extensive"


2. Women are only admitted into/to this club.
The latest version of the software is now released.


(1.)   In the first sentence, does it mean the same if I say, “Only women are admitted into/to this club’? The original sentence doesn't make sense, the way you rephrased it does.
(2.)   In the second, can I substitute “version” for “edition”? What is the difference? You can substitute them, there is no difference, but we use "version" when talking about software.


3. I estimate the orders I have placed to value more than $25,000.

Our policy is to stock items at the prices or as close as we can, as other office supply companies in the area.

(1.)   In the first sentence, may I say also, “I estimate that the orders I have placed are worth more than $25,000”? yes, that's correct
(2.)   In the second. What can be taken in place of “stock items”? carry items, even sell items in this particular case.


4. Can I ask you all please be prompt for all appointments and keep to the schedule?

I’d like to say “many thanks” to you and all the staff for making our conference at the Maybridge Center such a great success. Many delegates mentioned what a fantastic  venue the Maybridge Center is, with excellent facilities and wonderful catering.



(1.)   What can taken in place of “prompt” and “keep to the schedule”? on time, stick to the schedule/agenda.

(2.)   In the second, what can be taken in place of “delegates” and “catering”?
“Representatives” and “food and drinks”? Yes to representatives; I'd stick to catering. Catering is more than just food and drinks, it's about the services provided as well.


5. Local residents in the town of Brookside gathered to protest against for a new fast food restaurant and gas station. They feel it is unsuited to the neighborhood and worried about the negative effects on their property values.

Your first sentence needs rewritten: ... to protest against a new fast food..."
What can be taken in place of “unsuited” and “their property values”? unfitted, or inappropriate, and the prices of their houses if you must change it (I wouldn't)  

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