Expressing Yourself to Others/Second Chance??
So I am in sort of a dilemma with a guy that I met this past summer. We are both college students -- he is a senior and I'm a junior. We hit it off instantly and things seemed to be going very well -- we were communicating often enough and he seemed very interested in getting to know me. Even when the fall semester started up, I hung out with him and his roommates a few times early on. The first time that we really hung out together, it was pretty amazing -- lots of laughs, sports talk, games, food, etc. He even gave me the "I want to kiss you" gaze when he walked me to my car and said goodnight, but I denied his advance. I was (and still am) truly interested in him, but I did not act like I was when I was hanging out with him; I would come off as being really meek, shy, and gave very little indication that I was interested in him. Though we had been getting to know each other for a few months, I had not opened up to him about my past relationships; I had been hurt twice by the same guy over the course of three years, which has caused me to put up a front when it comes to expressing myself to someone that I am interested in. And though he seems to be a really nice guy, I just couldn't find it in me to open up to him due to the fact that I was afraid of the past reliving itself with this new guy. After about the third time or so of us hanging out, he started talking to me less and less -- as though he had lost interest in me or had just given up. As soon as I came home from the last time we had hung out, I started beating myself up; I knew that I was interested in this guy and kept telling myself that I may blow my opportunity if I keep acting the way that I'm acting, despite my fear of being hurt again. Since then (which has been since about the end of October), I have contacted him a few times about hanging out and it was almost as though he was ignoring my gestures. I was severely adamant about seeing him again because I wanted to give him insight on my past situation and let him know that I really do care for him. A little bit more recently though, we have talked here and there during the holiday season, but nothing stimulating or long-lasting since he was out of the country for the past month. We are now back at school for the spring semester (his last semester :( ) and I really want to let him know how I feel about him; I know that a few months have passed since we have interacted face-to-face and he may no longer be interested in me, but I feel like if he knew how I felt and if I finally opened up to him about my past, he may understand why I came off the way that I did and possibly give me a chance to spark something. Is this plausible? And this is pretty rudimentary, but I am not sure of how to even get him to hang out with me again -- before, it was as simple as me texting him and he would readily comply, but more recently, as I mentioned, he hasn't seemed too motivated or pressed to hang out with me. Any words of advice on how I can go about doing that?
woman up,a man admires a woman who he don't have to chase.You can effectively communicate what you want in any relationship without being aggressive. Knowing and saying what you want is not a bad thing.I think most of us miss out on great relationships because we expect others to read our mind,shy people miss out on the right people.Say "I love you". While you don't necessarily have to do this, it is the clearest way of communicating that you love someone. Here are some tips on making the experience more meaningful:
•Do it in person. Telling someone you love them over text, email or IM doesn't have the same impact as actually saying it out loud. If you can't handle being in that person's presence as you say it, do it over the phone.
•Manage your expectations. Don't let the experience hinge on whether or not the other person says it back. You should be saying it because you want to let him or her know how you feel, not because you need validation or expect something in return. Focus on being happy that you're able to express your feelings and make someone else feel admired.
•Pick the right time. Ideally, the moment that you tell someone you love them should be intimate and free of interruption. Pick a setting in which you can express yourself without feeling embarrassed or worried about someone else intruding.
•Keep the conversation low-pressure. Some people might see an "I love you" as indicating a higher level of commitment. Don't automatically assume the other person is ready to take the relationship to a closer level. Instead, preface your words by saying that you're not asking for anything in return and that you don't want the other person to feel pressured. This will help him or her enjoy the moment without worrying about what might be coming next.
•Maintain eye contact. It might seem terrifying to look into his or her eyes while you spill your guts, but try to do it. It will make you seem more honest and sincere, as well as enhancing the closeness of the moment.
•Don't allow an awkward silence. If the person you adore is quiet after your confession, find a way to start up normal conversation again. Say something like, "You don't have to say anything back. I'm just happy I could let you know how I feel" and carry on as usual. If a reply is coming, it will happen in its own time.
Write a nice letter. You don't have to explicitly write "I love you" in the note, but you can outline the things you admire about the other person. A lot of people prefer to write down their feelings because it allows you time to revise your words so that they're just right.
•If possible, write your feelings down with a pen and paper instead of on a computer. Your unique handwriting adds a personal touch to the letter, and he or she might like to have a physical object that represents your feelings.
•Before you start, write a small brainstorm of all the things you like or admire about him or her. Note close experiences you've shared, or things that remind you of the other person.
Make eye contact. Whenever you can, meet the other person's eyes. Don't stare after him or her constantly, but do allow yourself to be caught looking at his or her face once in a while. When you've been detected, smile a little bit and hold the gaze for another second before looking away. Show your feelings through your actions. Non-verbal cues can count for a lot, and allow someone to see how you feel without putting yourself out there too much. Here are some possibilities:
•Smile. The best thing you can do is also the easiest - throw your loved one a sincere smile whenever you can. Whenever you do, try to hold his or her eyes for slightly longer than a second.
•Make your body language seem receptive. A side effect of being nervous around this person might be that your body language seems closed off or unapproachable. Try to reverse this by keeping your arms unfolded, and your arms loose at your sides or clasped behind your back. Turn your body toward the other person when you're talking to them, including your feet. Incline your head toward them when you make eye contact.
•Don't worry about blushing. You can't control when you blush anyway, but if you find yourself doing it around him or her, just go with it. In a way, a blush is a useful signal to the other person letting them know how you feel - so let it do its work!i pray u peace,feel free to rate me or and follow up,nnot so lengthy though,thanks
email or text these flirty text msg;Flirty text messages are one of the best ways to show someone you like them more than a friend. Maneuvering through the dating scene can be tough. Get your love interests' attention by sending flirty texts and gauging their response. Below are great examples of different types of messages to send to a guy or girl that you're interested in to keep the conversation going or end on a good note. Whether it's cute to down right dirty find the word to put yourself out there for love with these flirty text messages.
You're in my 4AM thoughts.
I'll admit you're on my mind more than just sometimes.
Ugh, I have a problem I can't stop thinking about you.
Morning sleepyhead... hope you have a great day! xo
Send me a picture so I can tell Santa my wish list.
Let's make like fabric softener and snuggle.
Let's commit the perfect crime: I'll steal your heart, and you steal mine.
I'm thinking when you wear _________ it really turns me on!
Would u rather... get your foot stuck in a bear trap or hang out with me this weekend?
Serious issue: can't stop thinking about u.
Bored @ home... up for a Sunday Funday?
Thou art to me a delicious torment.
How you doin'? ;)
Hey, cutie. =)
Where've you been hiding?
Been a while. Thought I'd say hello.
KOTC --> Kiss On The Cheek
:-*( --> I'd like more than just a kiss on the cheek
BMHWB --> Be My Hot Water Bottle
:-9 --> Licking Lips
Come save me ;)
I'm on a mission to get over you, in other words mission impossible.
I may run out of messages to text you. I may run out of jokes, too. I may also run out of battery, but my heart won't run out of space for you!
I just want to be upfront and say that I visually enjoy you.
You look great today. How do I know? Because you look great everyday.
Oh, I am liking this, so what happens next?
So if I am right, you talked to me first and texted me first. Does that mean you are stalking me? I like it!
I am going to bed right now. You want to keep texting or do you want to switch it up...I am not tired.
I think we should just be friends with benefits...you'd like that.
Hi, I’m doing a survey …What’s your name? What’s your phone number? Are you free next Saturday?
Stop thinking about me!
I wish I was a teddy bear that lay upon your bed, so every time you cuddled it, you cuddled me instead.
Do you believe in love at first sight or do I have to walk by again?
My night has become a sunny dawn because of you
You + Me= I have a situation!… Can’t stop thinking about you.
good luck,bless u