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You are here: Experts > Parenting/Family > Step-Parenting > Family Law (Divorce, Family Relations) > Possible Divorce: Marriage Consoler.
Expert: Jeff Laatsch
Date: 7/18/2008
Subject: Possible Divorce: Marriage Consoler.
Question
QUESTION: Im an active army soldier currently in Iraq. My wife if 5 years admitted she has been cheating on me the whole time ive been here. I have 2 young children with her which she has lost to child protective services more than once since ive been here. Im wanting to get a divorce and custody of my children but i will be stationed in germany for the next couple of years. My wife and children are in Texas. Ive asked everyone i can think of but cant get an answer, what should i do?
ANSWER: Randy:
DISCLAIMER:
I AM NOT A LAWYER or ATTORNEY. I am someone who has experience with family law issues, and am sharing my OPINION only. For the exact law as it pertains to your specific case contact a Professional Attorney in your area/county.
I strongly recommend hiring a Professional Attorney: Most Attorneys offer 1/2 free consultation time during which you can discuss the case and payment options.
I would recommend first seeing a marriage consoler prior to doing anything else, OK. It is my understanding that it is very difficult for Wife and soldier in the Military: Lots of stress on both sides: This is why I advise seeing a marriage consoler to see if you can work through the marriage: If you have family, they will need to get involved especially if you plan on filing a motion for divorce and custody of said children.
Depending on your results of marriage consoling will depend on your filing a Divorce:File a motion for a child support with worksheets: File a motion Parenting Plan:Now you will need to talk to your Commanding Officer requesting leave at home during the period of motion for custody: Declare it a 'hardship' if necessary: Then the military will work with you to place you close to home. You cannot be overseas deployed while trying to gain custody of said children.
Kind Regards,
Jeff
---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------
QUESTION: thank you for responding. I just had one more question if I may. I know that there is no way to work out our marrage, because she told me that she doesn't love me, and i asked her why she said because things change. And I know that I cannot forgive her for what she has done. She has cheated many times and with many different people, she addmitted it plus I have proof, she was even cheating when i was home for my 18 day R & R. My question was that i was told that if i file for divorce I will have to pay her allimony and keep up her standard of living which I don't think is fair, is this true? I know that she will most likely get the kids which i and others feel will put them in danger because of all the neglect and endangerment in the very recent past, I feel helpless in this, does this change anything?
Answer
Randy:
DISCLAIMER:
I AM NOT A LAWYER or ATTORNEY. I am someone who has experience with family law issues, and am sharing my OPINION only. For the exact law as it pertains to your specific case contact a Professional Attorney in your area/county.
I strongly recommend hiring a Professional Attorney: Most Attorneys offer 1/2 free consultation time during which you can discuss the case and payment options.
I am not 100% sure but in some cases spousal support is necessary until ex can get back on their feet: You really need to talk to an Attorney to answer the rest of your questions: However, one thing is for certain:
You will need to talk to your Commanding Officer requesting leave at home during the period of motion for custody: Declare it a 'hardship' if necessary: Then the military will work with you to place you close to home. You cannot be overseas deployed while trying to gain custody of said children.
I cannot see a court awarding the children to you as long as you are deployed, sorry.
Kind Regards,
Jeff
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