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You are here: Experts > Parenting/Family > Step-Parenting > Family Law (Divorce, Family Relations) > Divorce: Doing it yourself: VA
Expert: Jeff Laatsch - 10/21/2009
Question
Good evening: My wife is from a former USSR country. We've been in the US nearly 9 years now, and she is a US citizen as is our son. We were actually married in a civil ceremony at the local City Hall of her home city 9 years ago, but both intend to remain in the US in Virginia for the duration. In our conversations together, we are both determined if we do ultimately divorce to do things in an inexpensive and civilized manner as possible. We feel we can largely agree on the outlines of how the divorce settle ment would work (i.e. how much money goes where, ongoing support/alimony, child custody and visitation etc.). We'd probably use a mediator to assist in fleshing things out, but largely we should be able to figure out on our own. To simplify things, we would ideally like to follow the following timeline and approach:
1) We can get the divorce done instantaneously in her former home city (her Mom can do all of this for us). Gets around the need to live apart for 12 months before getting things done. Alternatively, she or I might live for the minimum period of time in Nevada or even Guam to be able to get divorced quickly.
2) In terms of the actual settlement terms though - i.e. how much payment support, child custody/visitation etc. - we would like that to be filed in the US in our current state of Virginia. Our mediator would assist us.
Is this possible - i.e. get the divorce decree from the local Russian city, have it translated, and then file it in local state court here in VA with our agreed-upon settlement terms (or, something similar with Nevada or Guam)? She is keen to begin a new relationship with a close friend, which frankly speaking I am fine with, and so we do not want to wait for the 12 months "living apart" rule to apply. Filing the actual settlement terms in VA state court ensures that we both are committed to the terms of spousal/child support (her priority) and child visitation and involvement (my priority).
I understand you are not a VA attorney, but at a general level, could something like this work or is it totally wacky?
Answer
Alan:
DISCLAIMER:
I AM NOT A LAWYER or ATTORNEY. I am someone who has experience with family law issues, and am sharing my OPINION only. For the exact law as it pertains to your specific case contact a Professional Attorney in your area/county/country.
You will need the following:
Ref Web Site:
http://www.divorcesource.com/Divorce/Virginia-Divorce-Forms-133.shtml
Virginia Divorce Forms
This is a list of divorce forms for the state of Virginia. Following the list is a brief summary of each form and its purpose. This list of forms is not exhaustive and not all forms listed are required for every divorce. Due to unique case situations and special divorce filing procedures in Virginia, certain forms may or may not be required by the Virginia courts.
•Monthly Income and Expense Statement
•Sole Custody Child Support Guidelines Worksheet
•Shared Custody Child Support Guidelines Worksheet
•Bill of Complaint for Divorce
•Divorce Case Cover Sheet
•Acceptance/Waiver of Service of Process and Waiver of Future Service of Process and Notice, Form, CC-1406
•Acceptance of Service and Affidavit of Service
•Request for Order of Publication
•Affidavit in Support of Order of Publication (Diligent Efforts to Locate; Location Unknown; No Attempt to Serve)
•Affidavit in Support of Order of Publication (Non-Resident of Virginia)
•Affidavit in Support of Order of Publication (Virginia Resident; Location Unknown; Service Attempted)
•Affidavit for Service by Publication
•Order of Publication
•Answer
•Request for Ore Tenus Hearing
•Vital Statistics Form VS-4
•Decree of Reference
•Final Decree of Divorce (Simple)
•Final Decree of Divorce with Child/Spousal Support
Monthly Income and Expense Statement
I recommend contacting the County Clerks office in Virginia/County where you live. Normally most county clerks offices have these forms available in a package for a price: Like a self tutorial process: Some State/Countys County Clerks office offer assistance for a price by appointment only: They cannot legally advise you but they can answer any questions.
In most Divorce Cases, as long as there are NO children, AND Mutual agreement by both parties this could work: HOWEVER, the main issue is 'Emotions' keeping them low and avoidable: Work together which each other. This works for Divorces WITH NO CHILDREN.
IF there are CHILDREN, different issue all together because EMOTIONS play into it: PLUS there are more papers to fill out such as Parenting Plans, Child Support Worksheets based on Finance worksheets, rarely is alimony given UNLESS MOM hasn't worked in years: AND in most cases alimony is ONLY TEMPORARY which is normally six months or less.
I recommend contacting an Professional Attorney: Most Attorneys offer 1/2 free consultation time to discuss case and payment options AND mediation possibilities.
Kind Regards,
Jeff
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