Family Law (Divorce, Family Relations)/Alcoholic Mother and Baby on the Way
I hope that you can help to offer me a little guidance for my situation. I am 15 weeks pregnant with my first child. My boyfriend and I are dealing with numerous issues and it has yet to be decided if we will be raising the child in the same or separate homes.
The most pressing issue is my boyfriend's mother; she is an alcoholic and takes medication for severe depression and mood disorders. She only drinks heavily on occasion, but makes terrible choices when she does including; a suicide attempt, driving drunk many times, a hit and run which led to her arrest, acting aggressive toward myself and others, speaking of killing herself and her ex-husband, slapping my boyfriend, and more recently threatening to kill me (through text, which I saved a copy). I've spoke with relatives who admit she has stolen prescription medication from them and years ago she was forced to retire from nursing due to stealing patient meds. Usually, she drinks mouthwash in order to mask the smell of the alcohol. This, combined with her regular mood swings, makes it difficult to tell when she's been drinking. These incidents only tend to happen once every few months but it is impossible to predict when & where. She is currently in therapy but it doesn't seem to be doing any good.
For the past several years she has bounced around living with others and refusing to be self supportive. I believe that if my boyfriend and I separate she will be quick to move back in with him.
I am worried about the safety of our child being in the same home as her. My boyfriend does not believe this to be a risk or concern and is not willing to set any guidelines, boundaries, etc. No matter the circumstance, he refuses to stand up to her. I believe his love for her is blinding him from reality. I am at a loss of what to do.
Legally, do I have any rights to protect my child in this case? Can I get a restraining order against her or set it up so that she can only have supervised visitation with either myself or a professional present? I have done some online research and couldn't find anything relevant to this situation. Any advice you can offer would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you for your help.
DISCLAIMER: I AM NOT AN ATTORNEY: I am someone with experience with Family law matters, and can give some directions of what I would do but these are my opinions: I strongly recommend that you get an ATTORNEY who specializes in family law in your immediate county/country.
Your boyfriends Mother appears to have some issues, yes. You are correct in the since you do not want to continue to ENABLE her by providing sanctuary within your combined home, and especially with a new born child on the way.
I believe you do have the legal right to protect your child. However,unless you would have a collection of evidence that shows she would be harmful to your child you can really do nothing about it: Especially since the child is yet to be born.
You have a bit of time left before the child will be born so work on setting up a loving family home environment which means boyfriends MOM cannot be in home: The details of how of you work that out is up to you. Always keep in mind what would be in the best interest of the child.
Maybe you could live in separate places, you and your child in one: Boyfriend and his mother live in there own place: Then you have complete control over the situation and whom has visitation of said child.
Hope this helps