Family Relations/Children

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Question
We have 2 boys a 2year old and an 8 month old. WSe are engaged to be married in july 2015 and buying a house next may. The other night we were planning the wedding and were talking about our future. I told him that after we have sorted the house and gotten married I would like another child, he said he thinks he is done but admits that having one within the marriage is the right way to do things. Financially we are secure but he always worries about the finances and is worried about having to change the car and buy more baby equipment, which I have thought of and I agree with him but I pay for the car as it is and ill be the one changing it and continuing to pay for it as we have agreed that he will pay the mortgage, as he is working full time. I pay the car loan, electricity, shopping and whatever bits the kids need. Im a stay at home mum! Its 3 year down the line and im trying to not get my hope up too much but I really would love one more child. Do you think im asking too much of him? Is he over thinking things?"

Answer
Caitriona,

I would suggest you get married sooner than 2015 that is a long way off and much can happen. As I have worked with couples I have found in regards to this question of more kids that the person with the "no" is the one that needs to be listened to. He may change his mind, but if he doesn't want another child then he is the one that needs to be listened to. While difficult for you, things may change as he feels a bit more stable in the future.

Doc David

www.DavidSimonsen.net

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Dr. David Simonsen

Expertise

I am a licensed Marriage & Family therapist with a Ph.D. in Psychology. I work primarily with teens and families on a weekly basis. You will get the straight truth. I will not pull punches.

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I have been working daily with teens and families for the last 10 years.

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AAMFT; AACC; WAMFT

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M.S. in Marriage & Family Therapy; Ph.D. Psychology

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