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Family Relations/Problem related to past life

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QUESTION: "Hello there,
I have been with my partner for 2 years and we were constantly having sex in the last 1 year on every 10 days. Now, he is married and we broke up, he too is not happy with his marriage. But the thing I want to know that I have at least 2 years in getting married. And I am confidently sure of not having sex before marriage. Because he is the only one  i have loved. So my question is "Does after marriage, when I will be having sex for the first time with my husband, that will be after 1 or 2 years from now, will it feel like the first time? I maen tight like that? Will my husband know of what I have done in past? That I am not a virgin anymore?" or how to make that tight like the first time? I have heard about kegel exercise...but does that make that tight like it was before I have done sex for the first time?? I know about the hymen but stlii..?? Please tell me about it..
Thank You."

ANSWER: Hey Roza,

Thanks for writing in and dropping a word. It takes a lot to open up about issues in the back of the mind and when its related to our heart, it takes guts to pen down left alone talk with someone about the same. I appreciate your gesture in pouring your heart felt emotions and seeking a helping hand for the same. Kudos to you !!!

Well to be honest in today's world, it doesn't matter if you have had sex in past or not. Ask yourself how flexible you would be in sharing about your past life with your husband in future. In case you feel you need to share, then forget about sexual part and he won't ask you if you are virgin or not. But, in case you would like to hide the same, then you need not be conscious about your past sexual encounters. I do understand that, man do get upset when they realize that pussy of lady is quite wide and she was involved in past, but trust me it's more to do with sexual satisfaction and how much intensity you show. There are techniques to make the breast regain their strength and don't slag, but pussy tightening, doesn't result in positive way, rather it has side effects also related to the same. I would not suggest you to go for any such techniques, rather focus on being more passionate while having sex. If you need more suggestions, feel free to contact me directly.

Just go out and give your best and  things would fall in place...

All the best !!

Cheers,
Relationship Counsellor
Bringing smiles on the faces on the way .....

P.S- For more professional help around your subject, you can drop a word at, (relationships.counsellor@gmail.com)

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Thanks. Thanks a lot. I just want to deviate my mind from that. I just dont want to think about that anymore, but still I cant stop thinking about it. I just want to forget my past, forget him, forget what I have done. But I am unable to forget all that. I still dont know whether he has cheated on me or not, but the thing is he is married now and thus, I shoud move on. But I want help on it. I just want to forget all that and forgive myself for all I have done. Please advise me, what should I do?

Answer
Hello Roza,

Thanks for reverting and sharing your feedback. Appreciate your warm gesture and am happy, I could be of some help to you.

Well to be honest, you have been into sexual stuff a lot in past with your ex and it's quite understandable, when you in love such intimacy is natural. Now you are planning for marriage and have another 2 years and moreover, you feel that you can't get close to anyone else before marriage. When a body has had a lot of sex, then it's quite natural it desires more and atleast once a week, it's a natural process, but you holding yourself back. You missing your ex for simple reason that you had good bonding with him and he also satisfied you. I would suggest you to deviate your mind, you need to have a company around and also satisfy your sexual needs and body demands, else it would remain in the back of your mind and hamper your growth. Also remember that you haven't done any wrong nor you need to feel guilty about it.

Feel free to contact me personally, in case you need better solutions.

All the best !!

Cheers,
Relationship Counsellor
Bringing smiles on the faces on the way .....

P.S- For more professional help around your subject, you can drop a word at, (relationships.counsellor@gmail.com)

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Relationship Counsellor

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I am quite experienced and matured enough to handle questions related to following topics: 1) Love- Friendship 2) Issues in all kinds of relationships. 3) making a relationship work. 4) Effective tips to sustain a relationship. 5) Sex related queries. Well as of now haven't come across any such questions, which would offend me or I lack expertise in, but am a straight forward person and doesn't hold my wordings back. I don't mind being honest in case I lack knowledge about particular aspect and quite flexible to accept genuine views of others or seek other professionals for my case studies, to help the clients out.

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Well I have been doing online counseling through my own blog for past two years. I have got good response throughout, which has motivated me in going ahead and helping people in their relationship issues and bring a smile back on people's face. I don't say that am a professional in this area, but well sufficient enough to contribute in the aspect of Modern Day Relationships.

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I am a qualified software engineer with Bachelor's degree of Engineering i.e B.Tech degree in area of Electronics and Telecommunications. I am pursuing PG diploma in area of counseling and relationship education from Delhi University, India.

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