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Family Relations/Got chewed out for asking about money I loaned.


My 1st cousin's son (my 2nd cousin?) is 12 years old. At a family event he asked if he could borrow 20 dollars and he told me exactly when he expected to pay me back. We were at a restaurant that had an arcade, he wanted more money for the games. I lent him the money and called him the day after he said he would have the money back about two weeks later. I politely asked if he had the money, he said that he did and would give it to me on the next family event which was only a week away. I said "fine". No big deal right but an hour after that call my cousin called me. He was totally irate and asked why I was "harassing" a 12 year old for money. I called ONE time and was very polite. He mocked me saying that 20 dollars would break me because I was at a minimum wage job. He was really nasty to me, a week later comes and I try to smooth things over at the family event. He practically threw the money in my face and I never got an apology. Did I do anything wrong here? I'm not sure whether or not I should have even loaned the money.

My little cousin was at the event but he acted like nothing ever happened. His dad ripped me apart, all I did was loan money and ask about it. Should I have not loaned the money? Should I not have expected a 12 year old to pay me back? What?


Everything you did is reasonable. If it happens the way you describe it then the 12 year old is being raised as a spoiled brat. Let this be a lesson that just because people are family they can be just as rude as the next person.

Doc David

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Dr. David Simonsen


I am a licensed Marriage & Family therapist with a Ph.D. in Psychology. I work primarily with teens and families on a weekly basis. You will get the straight truth. I will not pull punches.


I have been working daily with teens and families for the last 10 years.


M.S. in Marriage & Family Therapy; Ph.D. Psychology

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