You are here:
- Home
- People/Relationships
- Grandparenting
- Family Relations
Family Relations/Questions Answered by Expert Rebecca Falck
| Subject | Date Asked |
| rejected by family | 8/3/2009 |
| Q: I am a 45yr.old woman, married 20yrs.,4 sons and 2 daughters. I became aware of my mom having a ... A: Wow,there are a lot of facets to this whole thing and I am not sure that I can give you a definitive ... | |
| Loud demanding behavior | 7/28/2009 |
| Q: My husband's daughter is 28 years old and I would like to find a way to curb or tolerate her ... A: Well, I suspect this is a "girl gone wild" and she is just going to act out as long as she gets ... | |
| daughter's troubles | 7/21/2009 |
| Q: I am needing advice about my 25 year old daughter. She has been with the same guy since she was 14. ... A: My answer is very simple; you must do the right thing for the grandchildren and call child ... | |
| My family dis-owned me and I need them back (Ithink) | 7/2/2009 |
| Q: this could be a very long conversation, I will try to cut it short and stick to the point. My mom ... A: I am a bit confused as to what led up to the disengagement by your family. So, I am guessing that ... | |
| Recently Engaged | 6/30/2009 |
| Q: Three weeks ago, my boyfriend of nearly 2 years asked me to marry him and I happily accepted. I've ... A: You have a lot to deal with presently and may have more to deal with in the future! Let me start ... | |
| Adulterous Pastor Scottsdale | 6/25/2009 |
| Q: My ex husband is a Pastor in deliverance, We are Christian Non-Denominational We have not been ... A: My heart goes out to you and the pain you are going through. It is not easy dealing with the ... | |
| A stepmom, that is jealous of dead mom & loves stepgrandkids | 6/23/2009 |
| Q: How do I keep my dad in my life and his grandchildren? Background: My parents were high school ... A: Blended families have their own unique set of problems that take time to resolve. Sometimes they ... | |
| Conflict with step dad | 6/21/2009 |
| Q: My name's Aya, and I'm 16 years old. I have a problem with my step dad which has been going on since ... A: Since you are in another country and definitely in a different country, I am not sure what your ... | |
| Another woman | 6/19/2009 |
| Q: My huge feelings make me handicap to know what first to say, but I will make up my self and start ... A: I am kind of torn here in a response to you. In some religions and cultures, it is not frowned upon ... | |
| Mom, what happened to Grandma | 6/16/2009 |
| Q: I've been divorced for 4 years, we have two children together ages 14 and 11. I have full custody of ... A: Divorce brings with it many challenges and this is one of them...visitation with the ... | |
| Step-Parent Acceptance | 6/14/2009 |
| Q: My Partner & I are each divorced. I have a total of 4 (4-15) from two previous marriages, and she ... A: she has a lot to deal with in her life. To give you a time frame would be impossible. One doesn't ... | |
| Step-Parent Acceptance | 6/12/2009 |
| Q: My Partner & I are each divorced. I have a total of 4 (4-15) from two previous marriages, and she ... A: I hate to say this but there are TOO MANY issues here to address in one letter. Without getting ... | |
| Stressed & in the middle | 6/11/2009 |
| Q: My parents are separated. my mother is disabled and taking care of my younger siblings (2 and ... A: I wish I could offer you a solution to your situation. Unfortunately, this is a very adult situation ... | |
| Father's Girlfriend Bad Talking Him | 6/9/2009 |
| Q: My mother passed away last December, and after she had left us, I told my father that whenever he ... A: Internet etiquette - should we randomly look at others MySpace, Facebook or other sites? Most ... | |
| Father daughter relationship | 6/3/2009 |
| Q: My name is Jeff and my youngest daughters name is Robyn. Robyn recently sent me an e-mail stating ... A: I appreciate your offer to share the emails, but I suspect that are some deeply rooted problems here ... | |
| State of Florida Child Support | 5/15/2009 |
| Q: The State of Florida deported the father of my children back to his home country in mexico. I am a ... A: This is a very simple answer - No. If you receive welfare benefits, this is your benefit in lieu of ... | |
| Paying Rent to Live @ Home | 5/15/2009 |
| Q: I'm 25 years-old and recently moved home about a year ago. I made the decision to move home ... A: You aren't going to like my answer to your letter...you are not ENTITLED to ANYTHING! That includes ... | |
| family ties | 5/13/2009 |
| Q: here is what has happened since I decided to write to you, reference to your querey about was her ... A: I am sorry to hear this has happened. To protect yourself further, you might want to seek some ... | |
| How to handle a brother | 5/13/2009 |
| Q: I am 1/2 of a set of twin girls and we have a brother seven years younger. We are 62, he is 55. I ... A: Well, there are some definite issues here! First, the children (your nephew) and your son need to ... | |
| family ties | 5/12/2009 |
| Q: where to start well, my wife says she is real close to her family but every time they get together ... A: Well, I am sensing a few issues here that I will address. First, I am not sure how long you have ... | |
| gift | 5/12/2009 |
| Q: My husband has a nephew who he hasn’t spoken to or seen in MANY years. The reason is because of his ... A: Yes, I agree with you. I think we sometimes feel the need to make up for the lack of socialization ... | |
| My Brother's girlfriend is taking advantage | 5/7/2009 |
| Q: I am 27 years old and I live with my partner, while my 25 year old brother and 17 year old sister ... A: I don't know if I can give you a definitive answer but I suspect that she is used to leading an ... | |
| Extended Family member living with my family | 5/6/2009 |
| Q: My Uncle and I used to be fairly close, but have drifted apart for the past 2 years- anyway in ... A: This seems to be a common problem with many families in the United States during this economic ... | |
| New PROBLEM with MOM | 4/25/2009 |
| Q: I have lived on my own from the age of 18. I am close to 40 and with the economy in the toilet I had ... A: Yes, the economy is forcing many families to move in together. While this may only seem temporary, ... | |
| parenting conflicts | 3/27/2009 |
| Q: my wife and her ex have shared custody of their young 5 year old daughter. He is engaged to be ... A: First, let me say that divorce is like a cancer. The "legalities" may be over, but problems just ... | |
| Lazy, Immature Husband | 3/25/2009 |
| Q: I am in a very stressful time in my life right now. All I know is something has got to change and I ... A: I am seeing a few issues here that I will address. 1) Your husband - He obviously grew up in a ... | |
| House in Disarry w/ BF son | 3/18/2009 |
| Q: I moved in w/ my BF in Dec.'07 & his ex-wife ran off to another state w/ another man & left us w/ ... A: Wow, there is a lot going on here so I will break this down as to the issues I am seeing based on ... | |
| work related | 3/17/2009 |
| Q: There are 4 of us at work and we have worked together for 18 years, a new lady came in and is a type ... A: I have to wonder how receptive to the new person you all have been? I'm not saying that you haven't ... | |
| Live in Mother in law Woes | 10/29/2008 |
| Q: My wife and I moved to Charlotte, NC about 5 months ago. It was always the anticipation that her ... A: You have my deepest sympathy! I, too, have experienced mother-in-law issues based on "not knowing ... | |
| Family relations | 10/23/2008 |
| Q: I am at a crossroads with my family. I am a grown professional woman who lives alone. I have two ... A: I can only give you some advice based on what you have written in your letter so if I am "missing" ... | |
| My son | 10/23/2008 |
| Q: I am the mother of three teenaged boys and also have a recently divorced sister with two teenaged ... A: You may be looking at a case of incest. Incest refers to any sexual activity between closely ... | |
| "Effects of not having your biological father present through preschool years." | 10/22/2008 |
| Q: Something my mother finally confirmed at age 21, my father was not my biological father. I was ... A: Frankly, if you have been reading research, you probably have a lot more information than I do! I ... | |
| My son | 10/16/2008 |
| Q: I am the mother of three teenaged boys and also have a recently divorced sister with two teenaged ... A: This is a very serious situation and should not be taken lightly BUT you must be very careful in how ... | |
| Family holidays | 10/14/2008 |
| Q: I am very close with my family including my mother in law. We even live within walking distance of ... A: My first response after reading your letter was a big "ouch" for your mother-in-law! I'm guessing ... | |
| paternity | 10/8/2008 |
| Q: i need to establish paternity however the mother of the baby wont talk to me and avoids the subject ... A: I suspect from your letter that your former girlfriend is afraid of what your actions will be if you ... | |
| Girlfriend vs. Gifts | 10/1/2008 |
| Q: I filed for divorce back in July 2006 and soon moved to Maine with my two children. It will be two ... A: Well, I am thinking a couple of things so I'll tell you my thoughts! First, there is no proper ... | |
| alcoholic husband | 9/29/2008 |
| Q: I have a 3 yr. old daughter and an alcoholic husband. I have been a member of al-anon for 8 months. ... A: Alcoholism is a disease. It can only get better with proper care and a willingness from your ... | |
| Family love problems | 9/28/2008 |
| Q: my girlfriend's mother dislikes me for some hurts ive done in the past,now i and my gf want to have ... A: I encourage you to seek some anger management classes to learn to control yourself. Remember! No ... | |
| Family love problems | 9/28/2008 |
| Q: my girlfriend's mother dislikes me for some hurts ive done in the past,now i and my gf want to have ... A: I'm really not sure how to answer your questions since you didn't mention what the "hurts from the ... | |
| child support | 9/21/2008 |
| Q: I have two children, ages 8 and 9. I am interested in filing for child support but my kids' father ... A: Actually, you can go to your local child support enforcement office and talk with them about filing ... | |
| welfare and fatherhood | 9/18/2008 |
| Q: Can welfare cancel your case if you refuse to name the father of the baby? A: The answer to your question is "Yes"! Why? If you are applying/receiving welfare benefits, it is ... | |
| I grow up without my mom | 9/15/2008 |
| Q: my name is Natalie I grow up without a mother , I ma from an Africa back ground where you are ... A: First, I think the main issue here for you is your African culture. It is my understanding that ... | |
| MIL issue | 9/8/2008 |
| Q: I just need some advice on how to handle my Mother in law. For the last few weeks, it has been so ... A: Usually when people are too invested in other peoples lives it is because there is a void in their ... | |
| Obligations Following Death | 9/5/2008 |
| Q: I really was not certain where to ask this, so I hope I got lucky. My grandfather passed away 5 1/2 ... A: I'm not sure that I am going to give you the answer you are looking for...but my thoughts are: (1) ... | |
| parental co hesion | 8/25/2008 |
| Q: I have an almost 4 year old son, next month is his birthday. My son goes to his fathers nearly every ... A: First, thank you and your ex for not spanking the child. Now with that said, accidents are not ... | |
| my teenage sister | 8/22/2008 |
| Q: My younger sister (9 years younger)dated a guy for 2 years and found out she was pregnant with his ... A: Your sister sounds like she is a very strong person and I hope for the best for her and her child. ... | |
| Paying child support but not getting visitation | 8/21/2008 |
| Q: They never went to court and had a court order to indicate what the visitation plan would be. When ... A: My best suggestion is for your boyfriend to seek legal advice in the state where you live. Since ... | |
| Husband/StepFather | 8/15/2008 |
| Q: My husband and I have been married for almost 2 years/been together for almost 4 years total. I ... A: My first thoughts were "Whoa - hang on here!" First, you are in a blended family. The word "blend" ... | |
| Meddlesome stepdad | 8/3/2008 |
| Q: Today my mom came to me with a comment my stepdad made about me being in my room with the door ... A: I am assuming from your letter that you are somewhere around 23/24? So, that has a lot to do with ... | |
| Only wants seasonal work | 7/29/2008 |
| Q: Rebecca My husband, 45, has held a seasonal job in horticulture (spring-fall for seven months) for ... A: Well, I have several thoughts regarding issues you brought up in your letter. So, let's start with ... | |
| addict friend | 7/24/2008 |
| Q: My friend who I grew up with and like a sister is addicted to pot and nicotine. She has a good job ... A: As I am reading your letter, I have to wonder about your relationship with your friend. It appears ... | |
| How do I put my feelings first and not feel quilty? | 7/15/2008 |
| Q: I am an only child, 50 year old female, married, no children of my own that lives next door to my ... A: I know what you are talking about! I am an only child too with an elderly mother. My difference is ... | |
| Family and school | 7/14/2008 |
| Q: I just read a response you gave to a young mother 2/2/2006 "Going back to school" and it gave me the ... A: Personally, I already see you as a success! What a challenge it must be to live on a day-to-day ... | |
| Help | 4/27/2008 |
| Q: I will try to give you a general synopsis here...I am 21. I have 2 girls, ages 10 months and almost ... A: You seem to have a lot of maturity for your age. You have already experienced a lot of adult life ... | |
| FAMILY | 4/25/2008 |
| Q: I am going through a custody and domestic violence issue. I provide fo my child everything under the ... A: I cannot give you a "yes" or "no" in response to your question. I trust you have evidence to the ... | |
| Daughter influenced by wrong people | 4/17/2008 |
| Q: My 21 yrs old daughter didn't finish her senior year at college. She works at Walmart full time. ... A: It sounds to me that your daughter may have a substance abuse problem. Whether it is alcohol or ... | |
| Stressed from lack of time to myself | 3/26/2008 |
| Q: Im a college senior and everytime i go home to visit my mother she always has some "project" she ... A: here is my last advice for you, what will happen if you say "No" to her requests? Are you ... | |
| Stressed from lack of time to myself | 3/25/2008 |
| Q: Im a college senior and everytime i go home to visit my mother she always has some "project" she ... A: Well, I have a couple of thoughts about your mom. Her projects may just be a way of spending time ... | |
| Help I have a way too Overprotective mama | 3/23/2008 |
| Q: My mother has always been very overprotective of me. You would figure that as I got older she would ... A: So, I have to ask...did you/will you share this letter with your mother? You are correct - you are ... | |
| Husband will not help with kids or anything | 3/20/2008 |
| Q: I am a stay at home mom of a 4 & 5 y.o, my husband works 12 hour days 5am to 5pm when he is home he ... A: S.; Thank you for writing. Well, I'm thinking there are a lot of red flags waving to me. So, I'll ... | |
| Estranged Adult Child | 3/19/2008 |
| Q: My husband is the step father of a 40 year old grown daughter which I had from a previous marriage. ... A: I am sensing a lot of different issues going on from your letter. First, I am sensing that your ... | |
| jealous to death | 3/16/2008 |
| Q: .through the computer since i read some of ur comments and suggestions to whom who asked a favor to ... A: Jocelyn - Unfortunately, the ex-wife will always be a part of this family especially since there is ... | |
| family problem | 3/15/2008 |
| Q: My wife and I were single parents for 14 years. I have 3 daughters, 36, 31, and 25. She has 2 ... A: First, I understand your sensitivity to your work that you do with the mentally handicapped. I have ... | |
| jealous to death | 3/15/2008 |
| Q: .through the computer since i read some of ur comments and suggestions to whom who asked a favor to ... A: Jealously is a terrible emotion to bring into a relationship. It mainly shows a lack of trust with ... | |
| Daughters choice and anger | 3/6/2008 |
| Q: I am struggling with a issue with my daughter who is now 30. When she was 18, she came to me ... A: I am having a difficult time trying to understand why she would be this angry over a conversation ... | |
| What rights do i have ?? | 1/27/2008 |
| Q: Ok im 14 years old ill be 15 in march and im going to have a baby in June.The father and I are ... A: I am sorry to say this but you and your boyfriend are TOO YOUNG to think about moving in together ... | |
| parents | 1/25/2008 |
| Q: Well my dad moved away a long time ago, after he got out of jail. And he never sends us any money ... A: Your mother is correct! He can be placed in jail for not paying court ordered child support. If ... | |
| how to deal with 4 year olds meaness | 1/23/2008 |
| Q: My grandson Connor was located in Cali away from his father & me "Nana" and in a situation where his ... A: Unfortunately, this child is going to have to undergo some counseling for his problems to be ... | |
| Please help | 1/14/2008 |
| Q: I need your help to try and figure something out. Even if you have never been through anything like ... A: I understand how difficult this letter must have been for you to write. Unfortunately, there are a ... | |
| Where have I gone wrong? | 1/8/2008 |
| Q: I don't really know where to begin ..... I split from my husband 7 years ago after 20 years of ... A: Whew! I am exhausted after reading this! All kidding aside, there are a lot of issues here and I ... | |
| Stepdaughter | 11/14/2007 |
| Q: This is my second marriage.He has a 9 year old Daughter.Mine are all grown and out of the house.We ... A: I hope your bags are packed!!!! PLEASE don't think of spending any more of your precious life with ... | |
| Issues with Mother in law | 11/13/2007 |
| Q: I cant stand her nomore ive done everything i can and its just her character im not the only one ... A: It is the age old problem of mother-in-laws and what is acceptable behavior and what isn't. First, ... | |
| MY FAMILY IS A DISASTER! | 11/12/2007 |
| Q: I HAD BEEN MARRIED 17 YEARS, MY 2 BOYS 15, AND 11. MY HUSBAND AND OLDEST SON FIGHT A LOT, JUST ... A: M; Thank you for writing. Sounds like there is a lot going on in your family. An adolescent having ... | |
| Mother--Medicare | 11/6/2007 |
| Q: I am not sure you can answer this but with your expertise in Social Services, I thought I would give ... A: First, if your mother has dementia that is causing her to forget that your father is deceased, she ... | |
| midlife stress | 11/3/2007 |
| Q: Right now, I'm a mess: Separated two years, unemployed, career is in tatters, brother in jail on sex ... A: I am assuming from your letter that you have been to a physician and had a check-up? Depression ... | |
| How do I deal with my fathers alcoholism? | 10/31/2007 |
| Q: Well it all started 5 years ago when my 17 year old nephew passed away.. my father went off the deep ... A: I could sense the pain you feel from your letter. Losing a loved one, particularly a child, can ... | |
| mother and younger sis | 10/28/2007 |
| Q: "I wrote in 3 weeks ago about my72 yr.old mother almost dying December 06, my 46 year old sister ... A: First, I don't have all the facts when people write to me and all I have to go by is what is in a ... | |
| Miss My Family... | 10/26/2007 |
| Q: I'm 30 years old and have always had a fairly good relationship with my mother. We were never ... A: Yes, I can understand your feelings about this relationship your mother has involved herself in with ... | |
| What to do | 10/25/2007 |
| Q: I have been dating my boyfriend for 2 years now,I have become very close to his 8 year old son,his ... A: My best advice to you is to talk with your boyfriend about this situation. I'm not sure if he is in ... | |
| Stepson Boundaries | 10/22/2007 |
| Q: I am beginning to have marital problems with my husband of 5 years. His son, 17, continually puts ... A: Step-parenting is a major challenge! I, too, am a stepparent and understand your frustration. I ... | |
| run away child | 10/13/2007 |
| Q: my duaghter keeps running away from home and keeps bullying me and is sometimes violent to me can i ... A: Yikes! This is YOUR 13 year old and you appear to be wanting to throw her away! First, I don't ... | |
| his, mine and ours | 10/11/2007 |
| Q: My husband and I have been married now for 8 years. I have a 16 yr old son, he has a 12 yr old son ... A: I wish I had some "quick fixes" for you but I don't. Step-parenting is a problem - there are no two ... | |
| i love my mom, but i never see her | 10/6/2007 |
| Q: i am fifteen years old, and i am one out of four girls being raised by a single mother. she works ... A: This is a hard question to answer - I'm sure your mother loves you and your sisters very much. She ... | |
| son and granddaughter | 10/4/2007 |
| Q: our 30 year old son left his wife and 4 year old daughter for the next door neighbor, who is 32. He ... A: I wish I had better news for you, but unfortunately grandparents have little to no rights to ... | |
| Teen Mother's Rights | 9/21/2007 |
| Q: I am 17 years old and live in the state of Mississippi. I became pregnant at 14 and now have a 2 ... A: First, I want to tell you how wonderful it is that you are continuing with school and moving forward ... | |
| teen emancipation | 8/22/2007 |
| Q: My child is turning 16 and wants his own life and make his own decisions as to where he lives and ... A: Emancipation of children should occur in very rare incidents. A 16 year old's brain is still not ... | |
| Urgent answer pls | 8/20/2007 |
| Q: Hey, I am 18 yrs old and in a relation since the last 2year.Not an hanky-panky business but a ... A: My first impression is that your family has different cultural beliefs on this subject and this is ... | |
| Stress Related to New Job | 8/19/2007 |
| Q: I recently started a new social work position working with the elderly population. For the past 4 ... A: I too, supervise six folks that work in our in-home program. One of the areas that "we" in social ... | |
| step-children problems | 8/6/2007 |
| Q: I have been with my partner and his two daughters for over 7 years - they are now 14 and 15.(their ... A: Well, you certainly have a lot of dynamics at work here. So, let's start with the lesser of the ... | |
| father in law issues | 7/30/2007 |
| Q: my wifes mom has remarried ..her dad passed away .this guy gives me the creeps when hes around my ... A: No, I don't think you are crazy - I think you are a concerned father. I'm not sure how long this ... | |
| interstate custody | 7/23/2007 |
| Q: My Husband and I are divorcing and he has agreed to allow me to take the children out of state and ... A: Actually, I would consult an attorney for a document that is binding. Yes, he may be agreeable now ... | |
| help for hoarders | 7/12/2007 |
| Q: I am a writer working on a novel with a subplot dealing with the issue of hoarding, The hoarder is ... A: I cannot specifically address the social service rules in Connecticut. You can probably research ... | |
| His best friend | 6/11/2007 |
| Q: My boyfriend of two years is best friends with a woman whom I find toxic. She and I used to be good ... A: This appears to be a classic case of your friend wanting what you have....mainly your boyfriend. I ... | |
| My son has a half sister that he doesn't know... | 6/9/2007 |
| Q: I'm recently married and had a child with a man I've known since gradeschool. After highschool we ... A: As I have written many times, there is a difference between child support and visitation so I will ... | |
| MY 50 YR OLD SIS IN LAW HAS NOT WORKED IN OVER 22 YRS - HOW WILL SHE LIVE IN HER OLD AGE? | 6/9/2007 |
| Q: My sister-in-law is 50 years old and has not worked in about 22 years, since she moved with her ... A: I had several thoughts as I was reading your letter. My first thought was has your sister-in-law ... | |
| Need advice asap!! | 6/6/2007 |
| Q: I hope you can help me sort this out. I have a 5 year old girl with a man that I was never married ... A: Well, we have several issues here to consider. The first being the safety of your daughter. This ... | |
| child discipline | 5/31/2007 |
| Q: I am a divorced mom of 3 young kids (15mo., 7yr, 9yr). My ex and I do not agree on discipline, the ... A: Spanking - I have never been a fan of this form of punishment simply because it teaches children to ... | |
| Visitation/child support | 5/18/2007 |
| Q: My exhusband sexually molested at least 2 of his nieces, beginning at 13. My 2 children (4 & 6) ... A: I'm sorry to hear that you were in an abusive situation but I truly applaud the fact that you were ... | |
| I don't know what to do - please help | 5/12/2007 |
| Q: I need some advice. My fiancé has 2 children - a son who is 12 and a daughter 16. He has 50% ... A: I run across this situation quite often with families. Should you call CPS - YES!! The children ... | |
| daughter | 4/23/2007 |
| Q: Hubby and I have a 21 y/o daughter. She lives w/girl from high school. She goes to college p/t ... A: Well, I have a lot of thoughts about this relationship. I guess I will start with your daughter. ... | |
| Deadbeat | 4/4/2007 |
| Q: My niece married a deadbeat. They met at a strip club where he worked as a stripper. He is 30 and ... A: Well, this is a touchy situation. Your niece probably won't listen to you and her mom probably is ... | |
| help | 3/25/2007 |
| Q: My daughter is twenty six months old and of course she is acting like it. Do you have any ... A: Your daughter is two years old......she is still a BABY!!! Please seek out some materials on Ages ... | |
| need advice | 3/20/2007 |
| Q: My husband and I have been together for 7 years. We’ve been married for almost 5. This is the 2nd ... A: There seem to be a lot of issues here to consider in giving you an answer to your letter. Why was ... | |
| i need help!! | 12/12/2006 |
| Q: I'm Rachael, I'm 16 years old and a junior in high school. I would like to ask you a question if you ... A: First, I am sorry about your loss. It is always difficult to lose a parent. I'm sure it is even ... | |
| a teen mothers rights | 11/27/2006 |
| Q: i am sixteen years old a mother of a two year old and used to live at home with my parents until i ... A: There are a lot of factors to take into consideration in giving you a direct answer. It is ... | |
| Teen faking pregnacy | 11/20/2006 |
| Q: Our 12 year old granddaughter has always been crazy about babies. She has lied to counselors and ... A: I have been away on a family emergency in another state. Many teens see "pregnancy" as a way to get ... | |
| what to expect out of a 22yr old? | 10/11/2006 |
| Q: We have been married 10 years. My wifes son is now 22yrs old. We cannot even bring him up without ... A: Well, it appears that there are several issues here so I will break them out as I read this: 1. An ... | |
| my sponge brother | 10/1/2006 |
| Q: My brother is almost forty and still lives in my parents home with his two sons. He only works ... A: I wish I could tell you how to become involved in this, but this is actually between your parents ... | |
| mother v/s wife | 9/9/2006 |
| Q: I have been married for 10 years now and have a very caring but adamant wife. My mother is also the ... A: There seem to be a lot of "issues" in this letter. So, I guess the best thing to do is start with ... | |
| emotional needs | 8/30/2006 |
| Q: I really appreciate your reply. Unfortunatley I don't deny that this is all my fault. My mother is ... A: Perception - maybe that is an area for you to work on. You stated it is anorexia victims "fault" ... | |
| emotional needs | 8/29/2006 |
| Q: I don't know what experience you have of mental illness, but THIS is evidence of it: I was surprised ... A: Guilt - that was the word that I believe you to be describing where your mother is concerned. Being ... | |
| emotional needs | 8/29/2006 |
| Q: When I recently told my mother about my attempt to go to holland for euthanasia, she asked me how I ... A: I can't help but focus on the first part - euthanasia! Why in the world would you even consider ... | |
| Grandparent Visitation | 8/13/2006 |
| Q: My husband received full custody of my step daughter who is 5yrs old now back in Jan/2005. Our ... A: First, congratulations on adopting Halen. All children benefit from having two parents - biological ... | |
| grandparents rights | 7/26/2006 |
| Q: me and my partner are not married our baby is due aug 06 his mother seems to think she has rights ... A: I'm not sure how old you are so I am going to assume you are over 18? If you are over 18, you have ... | |
| trouble | 7/21/2006 |
| Q: my boyfriend and me have been together for 2 years and i do love him a lot but it seems lately all ... A: I am not sure how old you are but I suspect you are in your teens? Have you talked to your ... | |
| Emancipation | 7/13/2006 |
| Q: I live in Iowa, I am sixteen along with my friend. My friend (Trevor) lives with his parents most of ... A: This appears to be a legal matter that an attorney could respond to better than I can. Since Trevor ... | |
| divorce and seeing other people | 7/10/2006 |
| Q: my divorce papers were signed in Jan. 2006 I have friends that has helped me out a lot. Thier was ... A: Divorce - there isn't anything pleasant or friendly about it. Couples who part as "friends" usually ... | |
| emanapantion | 6/12/2006 |
| Q: im 15 ill turn 16 in sept ...i live in iowa...i resently ran away to xcape a the abuse of my mother ... A: If you are being abused, you should talk with someone who can help you locally such as a minister, ... | |
| sons girlfriend | 6/12/2006 |
| Q: my 18 year old son is seeing a girl who is a flirt and gets my son in fights defending her she ... A: Sounds like a case of raging hormones!!! Sorry, but this is exactly what is going on. It is ... | |
| more help please | 6/8/2006 |
| Q: I told my daughter that I will only be taking care of my grand daughter, not her dogs, nothing else ... A: It sounds as though there is a lot of anger issues here that have not been addressed. It sounds ... | |
| Dealing with disfunctional family | 6/6/2006 |
| Q: my daughter and son in law and i bought a house together. I live upstairs, I am on SS and care for ... A: You have a major boundary issue that needs to be resolved immediately! 1) Have you told your ... | |
| What dont i know | 3/29/2006 |
| Q: My family are happy more than happy we are married madly in-love,always wanted a boy he is 7 months ... A: I'm not really sure what you are asking, so I am going on the assumption it is why your husbands ... | |
| Neglect | 3/25/2006 |
| Q: My 2.5 year old daughter"s Father was recently reported to CPS for failure to give asthma ... A: I wish I could give you a definate answer on this one, but social service agencies and their ... | |
| Children's Rights | 3/10/2006 |
| Q: Our family has been in the biggest mess I have ever seen for the past 8 years. Two children are ... A: Wow, there is a lot going on in this family. Children's rights - actually the children do have a ... | |
| going back to school | 2/24/2006 |
| Q: I am a stay at home mom with a one year old. My husband provide a comfortable life for us but he is ... A: Well, this could be answered several different ways and from many different viewpoints. I guess the ... | |
| advise | 2/12/2006 |
| Q: What are the ten best advices that a parent can give to their children? A: I wish I could give you a definate answer but you didn't state the age of the child. I think the ... | |
| I would like to visit my children | 2/4/2006 |
| Q: My daughter lives in Kentucky, she has 2 children, ages little girl 5, boy 2. She and her husband ... A: I wish I had better news for you but when the judge ruled on the permancy plan, he stipulated with ... | |
| Problems with son | 10/27/2005 |
| Q: I regularly do not do this but my family is going through a crisis right now and I could really use ... A: Yes, you have some serious issues here with your son. Without seeing him and being able to talk ... | |
| house rules | 10/3/2005 |
| Q: i have a 19 daughter and a granddaughter2 that live with us and our son 14. we have some house ... A: Sounds like there are a LOT of issues here. First, it is difficult for adult children and parents ... | |
| 19 yr does not like house rules | 10/1/2005 |
| Q: my daughter 19 ,granddaughter 2 live with us.. i , warrant ,loan payment, which she created for ... A: I really don't have enough information to give you a specific answer so I will give you ... | |
| Emancipation of Minors | 6/1/2005 |
| Q: I live in Indiana and my husband and I travel alot. My children are 17 and 15. I was wondering if ... A: You should probably seek legal assistance to answer that question. I would also suggest that you ... | |
| Best Friend's Mom | 5/17/2005 |
| Q: My best friend, Marie, has two young children. Her mother, Catherine, essentially thinks that they ... A: You sound like a very caring person who is willing to be a supportive adult in the lives of your ... | |
| Do you know anything about Interstate Custody of Grandchild? | 4/22/2005 |
| Q: I'm trying to get custudy of my Grandson. He was taken from his parents in TX by CPS, due to drug ... A: I would STRONGLY suggest that you seek legal counsel for yourself. They can better advise you about ... | |
| Families | 2/6/2005 |
| Q: First, thanks for your time. i'm 21 (still living at home). i have father who constantly shouts ... A: First, let me empathize with you for having to endure this type of behavior from a parent and to ... | |
| Teen Parent Responsibility | 12/18/2004 |
| Q: My mother-in-law is currently taking care of my 7 month old niece. My sister in law (the mother of ... A: Teen moms - that is a subject I could write about for a long time! Basically, I think it depends on ... | |
| My own children and stepdaughter | 12/8/2004 |
| Q: I have three great kids (12 yr son, 8 yr daughter and a newborn baby son, which is only 13 days ... A: You'll be glad to know you are not the only person in this boat - you have PLENTY of company. You ... | |
| eating dinner with your family | 12/6/2004 |
| Q: I am curious about what you think the current status is of american families eating dinner together ... A: Yes, I think it is important that families take time to sit and talk with one another. ... | |
| Just looking for input | 11/27/2004 |
| Q: I would like your input on a situation. First a little history: My husband has two children from ... A: Sounds like there are a number of issues at work here. First, it is extremely hard to be a step ... | |
| discipline vs. compassion | 11/11/2004 |
| Q: It was REALLY well worded and thoughtful...and it really made me thinking. AND...my debate went ... A: I'm not really sure what you are wanting...I'm thinking that you are looking at parenting from a ... | |
| Family roles in african american cultures | 11/7/2004 |
| Q: I need to know what roles each family member plays and how they communicate. A: Cheryl; Thank you for writing. This is really a broad area to cover. I am not african americian ... | |
| Child care authorization | 10/5/2004 |
| Q: Being a grand parent and one who will be soon having my grandchild live with me, I have written an ... A: It is legal in most states to have just a handwritten letter from the parent(s) or legal guardian ... | |
| adult child paying rent | 10/4/2004 |
| Q: ............ Our 20 year old son has had issues growing up......diagnosed ADHD when he was 9, in ... A: I have mixed feelings about your son. Based on what I am reading, he has some mental health issues ... | |
| Hello, My friend is currently... | 9/24/2004 |
| Q: My friend is currently in a relationship with this girl. He recently told me that they were ... A: I'm not really sure about the genogram that you provided...I would really need to see more names and ... | |
| permanency hearing | 9/22/2004 |
| Q: My husband and I have had our 2 grandchildren with us since December as foster (kinship) parents. ... A: I don't have the specifics for each state as each state does have some variation in laws. ... | |
| daughter having problems | 8/23/2004 |
| Q: My daughter is almost 23 , with 2 kids no husband , in either case, no job ,living with my husband ... A: Many times when people get out of "committed" relationships they begin to question their ability to ... | |
| Parental Rights? | 8/20/2004 |
| Q: I need help! My son and daughter inlaw have lost their son, my granson to C.P.S. I am trying to get ... A: Let me start with the fact that laws differ from state to state on child welfare and custody. Based ... | |
| What should i do? | 7/18/2004 |
| Q: i have recently moved from south africa to canada with my mom. My parents are divorced and my dad ... A: I can understand where you are coming from. I remarried several years ago and my step children and ... | |
| Debt | 4/13/2004 |
| Q: If my husband owes child support (a debt) can liens be placed on my property for it? Thanks. A: All I can tell you for sure is that each state can determine the course of action that can be taken ... | |
| custody | 3/15/2004 |
| Q: We have been trying to gain the custody of our grandchildren from the DFS in Salem Missouri....we ... A: First, you need legal advise in Arkansas and Missouri. Each state has different laws about child ... | |
| I really need advice.... | 12/3/2003 |
| Q: I really need advice. I know I sound whiny. But my entire life I have had major self-esteem ... A: It just so happens that I can TRULY empathize with you! I gave my ex husband custody of our 15 year ... | |
| Child endangerment | 3/17/2003 |
| Q: My sister and her husband act like 35-year-old teenagers. My sister unexpectedly got pregnant a ... A: After reading your letter, I can certainly see why you have issues with your sister and brother in ... | |
| H i Rebecca, i wanted to... | 12/13/2002 |
| Q: H i Rebecca, i wanted to ask u if you can answer this for me how can i know when can i get ... A: It appears from your question that you are young. First, let me say that if you are in your teens, ... | |
Family Relations
Answers by Expert:
Rebecca Falck
Top Expert on this page
Expertise
I have worked for 30 years with low income families and assisting them in becoming self reliant. I have work with eligibility for entitlement programs (welfare, food assistance, medicaid), state/federal work programs, goal setting, domestic violence, child abuse, and other barriers that families have which prevent them from becomeing self sufficient. I can answer general questions that a person/family may have. Please note that I am not an attorney and cannot give legal advice. State laws may vary based on your question, so please consult an attorney in your state of residence.
Experience
30 years of experience in working with a state department of social service agency and a non profit agency.
Education/Credentials
Bachelor of Arts Degree in Home Economics
Family Development Certification from Iowa State University
Financial Counseling Certification from Iowa State University
Parent Education Certification from Iowa State University
©2012 About.com, a part of The New York Times Company. All rights reserved.