Concerned psych wrote at 2013-01-10 13:12:13
I think that unfortunately what you aren't realising is that your mother effectively normalised incestuous behaviour between you & your sister and she herself became an enabler and a participant via her voyeurism. You now have a confused idea of what constitutes a healthy and functional sexual relationship because like it or not- incest is not socially normal or accepted.
The conduct of your older sister and of your mother constitutes child sexual abuse and I strongly advise you to.seek help from a therapist qualified in dealing with people who experienced child abuse. I am astounded that the person who replied before me advocated what you described as a wonderful response by your mother. I know of no psychologist/psychiatrist/medical.doctor/nurse or counsellor who would assess your early exposure to direct sexual experience via your sister and mother as ok or helpful. What your mother did was inherently wrong and frankly, disturbing. A more appropriate respouse would have been to immediately intervene in a non-threatening manner and to explain in a non-judgmental. and matter-of-fact way that your body is your own and that there is nothing wrong with touching yourself it is something.to be done privately. Children need to know child protective behaviors from an early age. Encouraging masturbation in front of family members is not remotely teaching that child protective behaviours. I am not advocating a prudush response to masturbation- it is a perfectly normal, healthy sexual behaviour, and also completely normal for children. There is no need to shame a child if they are discovered masturbating- but what your mother did suggests she derive sexual pleasure out of watching you and your sister. You were a CHILD. Not another free-thinking consenting adult. Please speak with a qualifies therapist for the sake of your mental health and future ability to have healthy adult sexual.relationships outside of your family environment. I would hate to think that as a result of the other answer here that when you have children yourself one day that you would think that behaving as your mother did was normal with them.
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