Female Masturbation/Am I a creepo
Hi my name is Amber, I have a strange question for you! I am very sexual and horny more than I should be but it really turns me on to do kinky dirty stuff. I'm 16 now but I've been like this since I was prob 11 or 12. First I've had many fantasies about being watched and knowing about it but acting unaware. For instance masterbating or showering either at school or home. My latest thing is to lay on my bed and masterbate all the way naked with my music up, knowing my mom or dad will open the door to tell me to turn it down. I'm doubt they would but it turns me on to think maybe they'll secretly watch. I watched my dad masterbate in his room once when I was 8, he didn't know and I don't think it did anything for me then, but now I have so many things I fantasize about related to that day. I've even gone as far as sleeping with a guy close to his age when I was 12 that looked like him. Just so I could pretend. I never would go through with anything with family, it's way weird but it gets me so horny til I cum. I also have used fruit and veggies for masterbating and without washing returned to fridge, just so I can dream that my mess is in their mouths. I'm sure they wash the food first but I love the idea. Lastly I have taken pics of myself with my phone and purposely left it in my dads car hoping he would look through my pics. I don't know if he has seen anything but I update them a lot, a dream he jerks off thinking about me. I know this is very weird shit, but it makes me cum every time. I have tried to rid these thoughts and watch porn or dream about normal stuff and I never cum. Worstly I have been in relationships and pretend their raping me when we have sex, I want to have a loving bf and have normal sex. I have no idea why I'm like this, "am I a weirdo"?
I don't think you're a creepo, but you should treat people with respect. Treat them the way you want to be treated. Locking your door when you're masturbating not only protects your privacy but also that of someone who would walk in. Masturbating with food and then putting it back unwashed is very disrespectful of the people in your family. Masturbating at school could get you into trouble. Only masturbate in private. What you fantasize about is up to you. It's only thoughts. If you want a loving boyfriend and normal sex, you're going to have to be loving yourself and want normal sex.