Female Masturbation/masturbation

Hello, my name is Kae and I'm a 19 year old virgin. I have been masturbating since I was 15 or 16, but I'm not sure that I'm doing it right. I've talked about it with my best friend and the time that takes her to reach climax is much longer than I need. In the last couple of months I've been doing it about 4 times a week, and each time I needed less than two minutes to "climax".I use the clitoral stimulation method. Somehow, it does feel good, and after it ends, I feel that my vagina is pulsating but the build up and the feeling last very short, and I'm left, so to say, unsatisfied. Also there are sometimes when I feel that I'm on the right track, but as soon as the build up starts, it's as if I'm overdoing it, and it even starts to hurt. Even after that, I can only feel the pulsation, but the powerful contractions are omitted. Also I make no sound. (I've read in some previous answers that that is one of the indicators) I've tried doing it while watching porn too, but the result is the same. Even though I am sure that nobody will walk in on me, it's hard for me to relax, mostly because I'm very self-conscious about my body. I've tried looking at myself in the mirror, but that just grosses me out and I give up. I've also tried to find my G-spot after watching several instructional videos, but as soon as I insert my index finger up to the first joint it starts to hurt and I'm too afraid to continue. Please tell me what I've been doing wrong, if I have, and why I can't seem to please myself.

Thank you!

Hi Kae, sorry it took a bit to get back to you!
What you describe is all totally normal! No 2 girls are the same when it comes to masturbation!
It's great you can cum quickly, so you are not "forced" to take a long time, but you can if you chose to. If you want to make it last longer just stop stimulating yourself when you start to feel good, and go slow :) As long as you are having orgasms don't worry about it too much. You will need to slowly stretch yourself if you want to be able to insert things. It will take time but it's ok to try :)
Keep having fun!

Female Masturbation

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Heather Smith


I can answer most questions about male and female masturbation including physical, mental and ethical aspects. I've helped many girls and women, and some men, with issues like not enough pleasure, too much or too little masturbation, mutual masturbation and teaching others, and using it to improve your sex life or life in general. If I do not already know the answer to your question, I will gladly find it or refer you to someone who does.


I have helped my sisters and friends learn how to pleasure themselves growing up. I was always the one my friends would ask about it and I would try to help find the right solution for them. I am very comfortable talking about the subject and any problem associated with it. I believe there is always a solution to any problem, but I will not hesitate to refer someone to counseling if the problem warrants it. I strongly believe masturbation is a healthy part of living for both sexes, and can especially be important for women's sexual health and relationship success. I have a bachelor's degree in Psychology and have done a lot of research on masturbation, and how a healthy amount of it can be a positive part of a young person's life, and an uplifting part of a relationship or marriage later in life. Personally I have been masturbating since I was 11 years old, and I have tried just about every trick in the book. I know what worked for me, what works for most people, and what is just a bad idea.

Volunteered for one year at a local soup kitchen which also counseled clients. Worked one-on-one with clients as a Volunteer Life Counselor there, finding solutions to financial, shelter and clothing needs.

G.E.D. acquired. Bachelor's Degree in Psychology from a Central Oklahoma University.

Past/Present Clients
I have helped many friends, my own sisters, college roommates, my friend's brother, a few men and women online.

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