Female Masturbation/Sex


Question
QUESTION: I have been dating my boyfriend for a couple of years, and we are getting to the point were we are really in love and are wanting to have sex. The problem is I'm only 14 years old but we love each other. He's not pressuring me into having sex, we just both want to. My boyfriend in 15 and is in the year above me.
How can me and my boyfriend have sex without anyone finding out?

ANSWER: Hi Paige! I love that name!
Hmm a tricky situation!
I can't really advise you to go against your parent's or his parent's wishes and sneak around. Besides, my experience is with the sexual activity itself, and no so much evading parents or guardians successfully ;) I was never very good at that myself, lol.
All I can really say is that when the time is right, the opportunity will present itself. Without knowing the intimate details of your life, and the details of why you can't find even just 20 minutes alone together, it is hard to advise you further.
I guess until an opportunity presents itself, you can continue to make yourself feel good with your own hands or toys, and if you have the ability, perhaps talk or text him while doing so. Partners love that ;)
Good luck!
Love,
Ashley

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Also, I would like to ask when i have been out with my boyfriend and i get home i always go up to my bedroom and try to give myself an orgasm all because i love him so much. the problem is i have been trying to give myself an orgasm for about 1 year and nothing happens.

How can i have an orgasm?

Answer
Hi Paige :)
Your body must be ready; and it sounds like it may not be. When you masturbate, don't focus on achieving an orgasm, only focus on how good it feels. Focusing on achieving orgasm can be distracting for you, and a distracted brain is not a sexy brain ;)
Focus on your bf or whatever turns you on most. Explore your body and experiment to find out what you respond to most, and then just take your time, relax, and focus on how good it feels while fantasizing about your bf.
You will get there someday soon, I'm sure of it :)
Love,
Ashley

Female Masturbation

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Ashley Morgan

Expertise

I will do my best to answer your questions about female masturbation, including what healthy masturbation is or how it can become unhealthy, when you should consider masturbating with others and when that may cross the line to sex, and how to handle masturbation in your family whether it's your parents, siblings or children

Experience

I am a Master's Student in Developmental Psychology and have focused most of my classes and research on healthy sexual development. I have helped younger siblings, friends, cousins and now my pre-teen daughter embrace masturbation and safe sexuality in a healthy and vibrant way.

Organizations
Church organizations, a counseling/soup kitchen volunteer organization and several teen puberty forums where I hope to offer advice

Publications
Class-specific college writing on Developmental and Sexual health

Education/Credentials
B.A. in Psychology at an Indiana University. One year of Masters classes.

Awards and Honors
Dean's list, 8 semesters.

Past/Present Clients
Family (siblings and my daughter), friends, cousins, and those I've met online

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