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Female Masturbation/How do I know if I'm cuming?

Hi I'm 25 years old, I wanted to ask you...

When I masterbate with my dildo, I push it in and out until I start tightening my muscles inside. When I tighten my muscles inside my vagina, I then start pushing the dildo in and out faster and faster. Then I feel like I need to pee, I then slow down and I don't know wether that was an orgasm or what?  I honestly don't  feel fully satisfied and I would like to keep going but if I want to put the dildo back in, it now feels sore so I just stop. I don't know what I'm doing wrong, can you please help?

Thank you

That's difficult to answer without seeing or hearing you, but it really comes down to, what do you feel as far as pleasure? Do you feel a build up of pleasure that leads to a peak wave of pleasure that runs through you for anywhere between 5-20 seconds? That is your orgasm. What you've described is all normal, it's normal to get sore after you've used a dildo for a while, it's normal to feel like you have to pee... but what about your pleasure level?

Female Masturbation

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Ashley Morgan


I will do my best to answer your questions about female masturbation, including what healthy masturbation is or how it can become unhealthy, when you should consider masturbating with others and when that may cross the line to sex, and how to handle masturbation in your family whether it's your parents, siblings or children


I am a Master's Student in Developmental Psychology and have focused most of my classes and research on healthy sexual development. I have helped younger siblings, friends, cousins and now my pre-teen daughter embrace masturbation and safe sexuality in a healthy and vibrant way.

Church organizations, a counseling/soup kitchen volunteer organization and several teen puberty forums where I hope to offer advice

Class-specific college writing on Developmental and Sexual health

B.A. in Psychology at an Indiana University. One year of Masters classes.

Awards and Honors
Dean's list, 8 semesters.

Past/Present Clients
Family (siblings and my daughter), friends, cousins, and those I've met online

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