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About christina Cicchelli
Expertise

I can answer the following questions about fetishism:

  • How to talk to your partner about your kinky fantasies
  • How to set up a "play date" for you and your partner so you can act out your fantasies.
  • How to practice your fantasies and fetishes solo.
  • The different organizations, clubs, or resources one want to contact
Crossdressers
  • How to approach your lover about your crossdressing fetish
  • How to play with your lover is s/he is a crossdresser
  • Different ways to can continue to make this fetish work for you
Other kinky specialities:
  • Animal Transformation
  • Foot Fetish
  • Role-Play
  • BDSM
  • Object fetish
"Unique" or "Uncommon" Fetishes:
  • Fantasies that involve supernatural creatures, celebrities, etc
  • Fantasies that may involve body growth, shrinkage, weight gain, etc.
  • Fantasies that include elaborate scenarios, scripted role-play, etc.
  • A combination of one or more fetishes
Edgeplay
  • Bloodplay
  • Watersports
  • Coprophilia/coprophagia
  • Roman Showers
  • Intense, consensual role-play with taboo or controversial themes (Rape-fantasy, animal-play, etc)

I can't answer the following:

In-depth information about medical play or bondage

If you need further guidance or coaching, then please call my phone line:

(646) 250-4999. Call for a free 10 minute phone consultation. I also offer hour-long coaching sessions for the practicing pervert.

Experience

BIO

Christina Cicchelli is a "Sexventurer" of sorts; she's spent over five years as a sex worker and has experience in a myriad of industries, including phone sex and professional domination. As a Mistress, she has worked in several NYC Dungeons and also visited devoted clients on an independent basis. As a phone sex operator, she maintained a large amount of callers who sought her guidance, creativity, and experience in fetish and role-play.

Christina is best known for her career as a porn actress. Under the non de plume, Simone Valentino, she's performed in a handful of films. She received an AVN nomination for “Best Actress” for her role in Afrodite Superstar and also won “Best New Starlet” at the Feminist Porn Awards in 2008 for her role in Audacia Ray's The Bi Apple.

Christina is a columnist for $pread Magazine and writes about all things fetish in own blog, A Fantastic Nightmare. She is also Betty Dodson and Carlin Ross’s resident Fetish Blogger on their sex-positive website (Dodsonandross.com) and coaches individuals and couples who seeking kinky inspiration in the bedroom.

Publications

A Fantastic Nightmare (Personal Blog)

Dodsonandross.com - Sex positive website and home of sex educators and feminists Betty Dodson and Carlin Ross

$pread Magazine - Printed publication for sex workers written and produced by sex workers


Education/Credentials

Graduate: The College of New Rochelle

Masters: English/Communications


Awards and Honors
2007: "Best New Starlet" - Feminist Porn Awards 2008: "Best New Actress" - AVN Awards

Past/Present Clients
Confidential but verifiable references are available

 
   

You are here:  Experts > People/Relationships > Fetishism > Fetishism > previous help

Fetishism - previous help


Expert: christina Cicchelli - 11/3/2009

Question
Hi I had written you some time ago about my desire of mine to have my wife smoke while I went down on her. She also wanted to be a little more dominant and use a strapon on me which we agreed on. The advice you gave us worked well, now here is the problem. Our sex life for the 2 weeks after your response was great but the last month or so my wife wants to go out as much as possible all slutted up with me in tow to bars. She said this is her being dominant and I wanted it also. The bars we go to she sets apart from me and wants me to watch her flirt with guys,if it was flirting I think I would be o.k. but she went as far as letting one guy finger fuck her and making sure I see it all. This last Halloween just a couple of days ago we went out and she was dressed as trashy as possible and still get in. I do like her flirting as she likes the attention and it excites me, I think this last time she went overboard and was stroking a guy through the clothes. I thought this was a little much and we left soon after. We did have great sex as she was very wet and the whole time I was down on her she talked about how big this guy was compared to me and how thick he felt. I was not even allowed to fuck her as she wanted me to use a dildo she bought on her because it was closer to him. I am not sure what to do because I wanted a dominant and aggressive wife but know I have a wife that I only get to go down on while she talks about fucking guys with big dicks. What do I do because I kinda let the genie out of the bottle. Thanks Brad PS I found she actually called the guy from the bar and they had phone sex

Answer
Wow, I'm sorry about what happened.

You need to sit your wife down and give her a straightforward talk. Tell her that you feel uncomfortable with her lifestyle, and it's not something you automatically agreed to; she just assumed that you would like it because she's being "dominant". There is the fetishistic act of cuckholding, when a husband or guy watches his spouse or partner have sex with someone else. Under these circumstances, the husband is thoroughly aroused by watching and sometimes doesn't mind feeling inferior to the libidinous lover, but this obviously isn't your case, Brad. So you need to tell her as soon as possible.

Maybe she's reawakened a part of herself that enjoys the attention and the encounters with other men. You need to figure out what will happen if she is satisfied with this type of lifestyle. Do you think you can stay with her? Do you think she's willing to give you up so she can have what she wants? There's a possibility that the next talk could bring up some of these issues. But, it's much better to keep that line of communication open and to address this immediately. Otherwise, you'll end up being starved of your own greatly deserved pleasure just so she can satisfy her own desires.

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