AboutNafeesah Expertise I can answer just about any question about dating for teens, but I can't answer questions unless I know the age of the person asking so I can give appropriate answers.
Experience I've talked to teens about relationships and I keep it honest and real with them so they're not looking at dating and other areas with a closed mind, but to understand that elements of dating does have consequences and that it shouldnt be taken lightly.
Education/Credentials Associates degree, bachelor's degree, and Certified nursing assistant.
Question I'm an 18 year old girl and I've had sex with guys on the first date. I mean every type of sex... Vaginal sex, anal sex, and oral sex (giving and receiving). I've done that with a lot of guys. I really don't think that's slutty but recently, I was talking to my friend and she called me a slut. We were talking about how far we would go on the first date and I told her that I've had sex on the first date with a lot of guys. She told me that's never done that and she called me a slut. She said that only sluts have sex on the first date. I told her that it's not like I give free blowjobs or something... The guy has to show me a good time first before I have sex with him. I kept telling her that it's not rare for a girl to have sex on the first date and she kept arguing that it is rare. When she first called me a slut, I was surprised but I guess that different people have different sexual morals. So, I'm not mad at her. But I wanna prove to her that having sex on the first date is common. So, can you give me anything to prove to my friend that sex on the first date is more common than she thinks? Statistics or personal experience would work... Do you know any girls who've had sex on the first date?
Answer You want me to be honest with you and say I agree with your friend that what you're doing is slutty because why would you have sex on the first date anyway? It's like you're not even bothering to get to know these guys. Plus not to mention you're building a negative reputation for yourself because if someone happens to know you and runs into one of the guys you had sex with all he has to say is you're easy and that will give someone the incentive to try and sleep with you.
Having sex with every guy you're coming in contact with is not only dangerous, but its disrespectful to you as a young woman. Having sex on the first date is common, but it will not lead to anything more and I am witness to that because the guy I was involved with stopped calling and emailing me which was a sign that I was just good for a booty call. Why would you regulate yourself to low treatment? You're better than that and your friend is concerned because with the STDs spreading out here she doesnt want to see you get something or even more getting pregnant.
Your friend is only looking out for you by telling you the truth because women who sleep around are less likely to get a steady boyfriend. As a woman who's been there and done that I am saying that you should stop because if you want men to respect you as a woman you have to respect yourself by not having sex on the first date. This is not the way to date and this is the fastest way to not get a boyfriend either.
One-third(about 27%) of women have sex on the first date, but in reality a good majority of women don't have sex on the first date. You're putting yourself at risk for STDs with your level of sexual activity. Try dating a guy and not sleeping with him on the first date you might find that men will stick around longer when a woman isnt just freely giving it all up.
You're 18 years old and once a woman has caught a sexually transmitted disease or gotten pregnant her chances at something serious dating wise goes way down. Women between the ages of 16-25 are at a higher risk for STD infection and that's something to really think about when you're being sexually active.
In in end the choice is yours alone, but if you're wanting to be serious about someone sex on the first date does not work and will actually kill your chances at a serious relationship. A man respects a woman more when she's not out there sleeping with every guy she gets with and definetly don't take this behavior to college because you'll see first hand how women who are sexually active with a lot of people are treated and it's not nice either.
You want men to respect you for the woman you are, but they won't respect you when you're quick to give up sex right away. I want to be honest with you since I have seen nice girls like you throw potentially good relationships down the toilet because they want to get laid with a guy on the first date. Don't set yourself up to be used because what you're doing now is definetly setting yourself up for getting used and mistreated. Respect yourself and a nice guy will respect you in the end.
