My brother is buried in Castroville Texas ,his so called wife by living together will not put a headstone for our dear brother but yet won't let us either. We feel our brother needs one as well as his children . We have asked the  funeral home and they say we have to ask her ,which she will not let us. Its been 8 years now ,we want so bad to put one .Can we just go and put a headstone without her permission ?

Hello Terri -

I am sorry that you are struggling to find peace for your brothers resting space.  I suggest the next step would be to ask the cemetery, they will be able to explain the best way to go about this.  I am certain they have experience this scenario before.  
You may want to try talking to the "so called wife" and explain to her that there is grief that needs to acknowledged, perhaps bring a close friend or therapist to talk with her.  

with care,  


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Kellie Gillespie


I can answer any questions regarding funeral planning, grief, alternatives to burial, embalming, natural burial, products and ideas how to make a funeral service or memorial service more meaningful and personal. I can't answer questions regarding legal issues, financial planning and what happens after we die.


I am a licensed Funeral Director in the state of California with 10 years experience.

B.A. from the University of Colorado AA from the San Francisco College of Mortuary Science, now part of the Sacramento Community College program

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