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Funerals/moving a family member


The son of deceased wife wants to move his mother to another cemetery. The d.wife was married to her 2nd husband (his 2nd wife) for about 28 years. Husband survived wife by many years. At husband death they were buried side-by-side in his family cemetery. Now her son wants to move her.  What if any obligation does he (son) have to pay the husbands family for the cost a new tombstone. The existing tombstone has both husband and wife's name on it.  The husband remarried a 3rd time and current widow (still living) would like to be buried with her one and only husband if former (2nd wife) get moved. Son is prepared to pay all the expenses but the family of the husband think he should help pay for the new tombstone. Any thought or help would be appreciated.

The fact that the husband's family is getting the plot back for the third wife should be sufficient. Is he planning to move the existing stone? Check with a monument dealer to see if the second wife's name can be obliterated so the third wife can be added. Let the third wife's family pay for that.


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Lisa Carlson


Funeral Law. Having written a 512-page book on funeral law for consumers with state-by-state information, I am very conversant with consumer rights in this regard: What are the laws on disposition of cremated remains? Is embalming required? Do I have to use a funeral home? Can I have a home wake? Is it a state law to buy a vault? I prepaid for a funeral but changed my mind. They won`t give me all my money back. What can I do? . . . If you have an immediate need for information because a death has just occurred or is about to occur, you may call me at 802-482-6021.


I have monitored the funeral industry on behalf of consumers for over 20 years. I have been a guest speaker to funeral trade organizations, consumer workshops, and social service professionals. I am regularly consulted by lawyers and legislators as well as journalists.

Funeral Ethics Organization ( Funeral Consumers Alliance (

Caring for Your Own Dead (1987) Caring for the Dead: Your Final Act of Love (1998) I Died Laughing: Funeral Education with a Light Touch (2001) Final Rights: Reclaiming the American Way of Death (2011) with co-author Joshua Slocum

Masters degree in Administration and Special Education

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Available as an expert witness for funeral-related court cases.

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