Expert: Matt - 7/3/2009

Question
QUESTION: Hi. I am 17 and I think i may be bisexual or bi curious.
About a year and a half ago, i thought i were in love with my best friend who
is also a girl, when i told her, she were fine with it. However, when i told her it
were actually friendship, she got a little wierd.
I accidently brought it up and she got mad at me and didn't talk to me for
months.
I started college and made quiet a few friends. I am now really close friends
with two of them, both girls. I thought i liked them both, then i realised that
with one, it is just friendship, with the other, i think i actually do like her. I
have told her this and she is totally cool with it and told me to take my time to
think and to not rush into anything. After i told her, I got very concerned that
she would do what the person who were thought to be my best friend did, but
she hasn't. I sometimes have fantasy's about the two of us kissing but i don't
think that i would be able to touch/feel/ have sex with her. Although, i think
that i really like her. Please could you help me, I am soo confused.
Thankyou,

Rachael

ANSWER: Hi Rachael,

Firstly, you should try and stop falling for very close female friends as it can make things very uncomfortable between you and your friends.

If this person is just a friend, especially a close one, then having sexual fantasies about them is not really a good idea unless you know you have some kinda chance with them as it will only make you want them even more, even though it is hard to control your fantasies I know.

You didn't really seem to ask a specific question so I just commented on what you said, if you want to ask anything else then don't hesitate to ask a follow up question.

Matt :)

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Hi,
I have a few close friends, it is only this specific one that i have actually thought of having feelings in that way towards. Although i thought i had more than friend feelings towards another friend in college, i soon realised that it were friendship. It is hard to not fall for some people.
I am eager to know what your opinion of my sexuality may be. I do not have sexual fanitises/thoughts for this person, I just have fantisies of kissing.
I am not sure if i am straight, bisexual or bi curious. I am sure i am not a lesbian as i am drawn to boys. I have never been with anyone but boys.
Please could you give me your opinion of my sexuality.
Thanks,
Rachael.

Answer
Hey Rachael,

From what you have said to me, you seem to be bicurious, but as I don't know you personally it is not my place to say your sexuality if you get me.

Unless you end up in a close situation with a girl, it seems like you will stay with guys sexually, to me.

Matt :)