Question Hi I'm sure you've heard from many people saying they're confused about their sexuality and well I guess I'm one of them. I'm 16 year old female and I'm beginning to really question my sexuality. I have always been attracted to boys but over the years I've found myself wondering about girls. I have always said i I thought a girl was say pretty but never felt an attraction like i did with males. my parents never really explained to me about being gay and i had to learn about it myself. this has left me confused for the past two or three years where i would think i was starting to feel something for my close female friends but later dismissed it as simple affection for a friend. i think i have dismissed and avoided the issue instead of facing it. recently after reflected over the years i think i have been attracted to a few females but I'm unsure if this is normal phase for most teenagers. i have started to find myself checking out a girl so to speak without me realizing and have done this occasionally in the past. I'm unsure if i might be bi-curious or even bisexual. i am still mainly attracted to guys but i have been thinking about what it would be like to be with a women and the idea didn't seem horrible or strange to me it seems kind of nice. I'm getting really confused trying to understand this and i was wondering if you felt similar confusion or what i could do to help work this out for myself. i don't know any openly gay people so i can't ask them and i don't have anyone to talk to. i don't think my parents are exactly homophobic but just tolerate gays. my mum says she doesn't care but shes made some comments or the way she acted once finding out someone gay in the past made her uncomfortable and i don't think she likes it. i know this doesn't sound bad but i don't have a good relationship with my mum and I'm not sure how she would react; i think my dad is just ignorant or indifferent. I've always felt isolated and lonely at times despite having good friends and i just need someone to help me understand or talk to, so if you have any advice or know any good chat room i could use i would greatly appreciate it.i apologise for rambling.
Two things you need to always remember: (1) curiosity is completely normal human behavior, and (2) you are who you are.
It is a very confusing time for teenagers when they feel they could be gay or bi, and even more so when they have no previous exposure or explanation of homo/bisexuality.
The best advice I can give you is listen to your instincts. If you're gay/bi, then you're gay/bi. If you're straight, then you're straight. Think on it long and hard. Do some real serious soul searching. Only you can know the answer (and believe me, when you know, you'll know). The biggest part, though, is (regardless of the outcome you come to) accepting, embracing, and sticking to what you have discovered about yourself.
I can answer just about any question on being gay (including but not limited to: coming out, curiosity/experimenting, dealing with family/friends/depression, etc.). I cannot tell someone specifically how to come out, but I can at the very least help guide them in the right direction (coach them, give them some friendly advice). I can advise and suggest ways for people to deal with bullying, depression, and self-rejection as well.
I am gay, I came out when I was 15. I had been bullied since the time I was in elementary school, but said "enough is enough" when high school came around. I've been put through the trials and tribulations of peer bullying and came out smiling. I was also the President of the Westmoreland County Community College Gay-Straight Alliance for two semesters, serving as Vice-President and Treasurer/Secretery prior to that (I've advised young LGBTQ people many times.)
Organizations CURRENTLY: Sigma Alpha Pi (The National Society of Leadership and Success), Freemasonry (Shidle Lodge #601), Big Brothers Big Sisters (of the Laurel Region, Greensburg, PA); PAST: SHS Environmental Club (VP 2 yrs.), SHS Drama Club, SHS Student Council, Outdoor Odyssey (peer mentoring program, Boswell, PA), WCCC GSA, WCCC Student Government.
Publications Teen Ink Magazine, Fall 2010 issue (book review for Dan Brown's The Lost Symbol)
Education/Credentials Graduated Southmoreland HS (Alverton, PA, class of 2010), attended Westmoreland County Community College for two years (did not obtain a degree), currently attend Douglas Education Center (Monessen, PA).