AboutHaffiez Michael Lithman Expertise I can answer almost all kinds of questions about Gay and Bi. I will try my best to help, give advice, answer all your questions and doubts.
Experience I can help teens with their problems as I used to be a student-counsellor when I was in high school.
Question So it's been a 1 1/2 since I liked this guy, he's 14 still, and we're
moving into 10th grade. In our 8th grade year, we've sat together, me
with him and his friends really, I've never really talked to him then.
But we began to hang talk a bit more over that period.
I moved away that Christmas Break, returning a few months after the 9th
grade year started. (Typically around October) So I saw him for the
first time in about 3/4's of a year. I was so distracted by him, he grew
more, and just... Gah... You know? I just fell... Re-fell likely, but I
liked him more and more, and now he's been on my mind almost every
minute of my day since then, it is now July of 07. Obsessive you might
say. I agree. Well, so I finally told a chick that liked me, that I was
bi. She said she was too, and then 'tried' (I'm not so sure) to change,
because she told her Youth Pastor. So everyday in the 9th grade, I've
talked to her about the guy I liked. She didn't find him too attracting,
but I understood, because that wasn't what I was looking for in him.
So, let's start with the 9th grade 'happening's'. I stared at him once,
I WAS looking at the clock first, in class, and then I thought of
him... Again... And caught him in my glance, and in about 5 seconds, he
looked at me with a look that was quite unaware, and one of those curious
looks you give if something catches your attention. All I could do was
smile, and shiver, and drop my papers and books after that. I was like
OMGOSH he saw me...
So then, there's another time, when I caught him looking at me in the
lunch room (Still in the 9th grade). It was half-way across the room,
when I saw him my usual scan toward his direction, and found him looking
at me.
So we went to a lock in together with a friend, and the chick I told
that was Bi. She came with to support me... If that's what you can call
it. Nothing happened between us really, we just talked (My crush and I).
We slept in the same room together... But he never really said
anything to me when we were laying down.
Now to band camp, just recently.
So, I saw him the first day, and he was a bit taller, and he talked to
me =D. We hung out a lot. About three days into camp, he began to eat
lunch with me, and some other friends. So everyone was in our little
corner. By this point, I told another friend I was bi, but NOT who I
liked, because the guy I like is our friend, and I don't trust her. (We're
all gay supporter's though)...
In a full class band period of the day, I'd see him looking at me,
staring, and I would be doing the same, and he'd catch me... We've hugged
etc., and 'faked' kissed... The thumb over the lip, and then kissing
it... Yeah... I want to do it again, but I can't till school starts.
I was resting once with my head down, and I felt his foot like touching
mine, and then it got closer, then he stopped, accident, I have no
clue. I like to think it wasn't.
We ARE a few levels below best-friend, I'd say. We hang out sometimes,
a few movies now and then, parties, and we talk on IM a lot more, hours
at a time sometimes now.
I've met the almost-best-friend stage. We've played the Five Finger
game with friends, where we say 'I've never' whatever, and if anyone HAS,
they lose a finger, and when lost all five, they tell a secret... That
no one knows...
But I've lost fingers over 'made out with a guy//Crushing on a
guy//Hugged a guy//Slept with a guy' kind of thing. Not sexually. And I've
actually really only kissed one... Some of my friends think I'm hay//bi
which I am and they don't know for sure, except the two I've told. I
intend on telling my crush within this Semester of school, the year at the
most. Tell me if I've missed something, and something I should do... He
has had no past of Girlfriend's only crushes, he has told me... I know
some of them, but they don't want him, and they are our friends... One
is kinda his best friend, like me... I guess, but he knows her moreish,
and she is bi and has experiences with girls. She has had countless
boyfriends...
Um, the guy I like has had no girlfriend's, I will say again. He is
quite interesting, and he's flattering and funny. He likes to be known
he's there I guess, I'd say anyway. He's a Leo, if that helps. And if he
has a birthday party, I should go, right? It'll be this next month, and
what should I do if he does? Should I ruin his day (Possibly) by
telling him I've had a monger rover him since the 8th grade...?
I don't ALWAYS masturbate to him, but he is an endless thought. I've
finally started having dreams MORE OFTEN then ever of him...
He doesn't seem TOO gay. But not TOO bi either. There's a thing called
the untz beat or whatever. 'Party boy' whatever, and he starts rubbing
up on someone, but not exactly sexually. He does a few gay things, like
hugs, and talks gay, and says "He's hot." a few times jokingly. He's
fun, and I've told him recently he is the best and coolest person I've
ever met, not only cause I have a major crush on him. And I've realized
now when we talk in person, he's usually looking me in the eye more.
Back in the day, it wasn't DIRECT, it was more... Between, he'd look at
me, but not in the eye exactly...
HE HAS had erections around me, and now that I look at him when he's
next to me, I see a paper over his area (like yesterday), his arm is
usually over it, and sometimes he leans forward. Once he crossed his leg,
it was too obvious. At the lock-in party I spoke of in our 9th grade
year, we were all piled next to each other on a couch, and he was 'trying'
to nap... It was early in the morning, about 7-8-9ish... I was next to
him, to the point I could literally feel his body heat... And I looked
down at him and saw he kind of had a hard spot in his pants, his hand
was kinda over it.
Another time was recently in band when he was next to me with his
instrument. And again after that in a band meeting, NEXT to me, and again
(Which was the paper thing). And that's pretty much all I can think of so
far... He's in one of my classes this semester, and 2 in the next.
So seeing as this is long, and obsessive, I'd like your opinion on
telling him soon, like a few months kind of soon, and if so, HOW exactly?
Like at a party? Alone? School? Something...
And if not, tell me what I should do exactly, give it time? I
understand that, because I can wait. Hopefully he won't move, and I won't, but
it's likely we're stationary. If I give it time what should I do during
that time? Befriend him more? Sleep overs? Movies? He doesn't do Scary
movies much... But I will watch whatever I can with him AT the
theaters... I'd love to, and well if there is anything you can tell me, please
shoot away, I am absolutely available, so please Email me when you can.
If you would love to continue to talk, then let's do so, I'd like to
have someone to pour out to... Because the friend I have that I told,
that was bi... We are losing our touch, but I know we'll get back
together, we've been so busy. THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH FOR YOUR TIME!!! I am
looking forward to your response.
If again you would like to know, I am a 15 year old male, and my crush
is well, the same sex of course, and he's 14, same year as me, just a
few months younger. We're in the 10 grade now, staring soon. I would
like to ask for a response before the next 10 days when school is likely
to begin.
Answer Thank you for your e-message received 30 July 2007.
Hey,
That is a very interesting story! You could e-mail me at HMLithman@GMail.Com (also works for MSN/LIVE Messenger) or HMLithman on Yahoo! Messenger.
Please do not hesitate to contact me should you have further query.
