Gay/Lesbian Issues/was this too foward thanks


i frequent my bank, and there is a new teller there and ive notice she is always eager to help me and if I don't go to her window she gets upset and wont speak to me, or if I don't speak to her she gets I called the bank and boy was she extra happy...I can feel her just smiling in the background....wth...should I ask her what's up or just leave it alone? my bro thinks she is prolly bi and has a crush on me....she is younger than me I do know that much.....and she comes off as freaky.....what do u all think is she just being friendly or does she like me like? not an outdoorsy person but I wouldn't mind chillin with her...well on Monday 02/22/2016 I gave her a note with my name and number on it and it said we should hang out and I gave it to her and left the bank, I had heard she was quitting so I said what the heck...cant win if you don't try and if it doesn't work out I didn't miss out anything....I was wondering is what I did too forward? thanks

Greetings Mariyah,

Thank you for sharing your journey with me.

Firstly, I'd like to congratulate you for the courage of reaching out to the teller with a note. You did your best to read her cues and you proactively went for it. Bravo to you!

Now regards to whether she is being friendly or likes you more than friendship is very difficult to determine unless it comes directly from her. From your message it sounds like the ball is now in her court to contact you to establish a connection outside of her work.

I recommend not to make assumptions and enjoy the journey of having a new person in your life. Who knows where it may lead. It can get awfully complicated if we create a story about that person's feelings before we to know from them what their situation is (or what it can be). Keep your self open to whatever possibilities. If she does end up contacting you, at minimum, you have chance of becoming friends.  

So to answer your "is what I did too forward" question, I don't believe so. I think you did what you thought was reasonable at the time and now it's up to her whether she'll take you up on you reaching out.

I hope that helps ease some of your thoughts.  

Gay/Lesbian Issues

All Answers

Answers by Expert:

Ask Experts


Reece Malone


I can answer questions on sexual orientation, gender identity, gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and transsexual sexuality (youth and adult), coming out and disclosure, transgender and gender-non conformity including transition process, how to support a partner of someone GLBT, sexuality and faith/spirituality/religion, safer sex and harm reduction, comprehensive sexuality education, and questions from service providers working with LGBT individuals and families.


I'm currently a full time sexuality educator and facilitator specializing in sexual orientation and gender identity. I hold the positions of the Education Program Coordinator at the Rainbow Resource Centre (supporting LGBTTQ individuals, families and allies) as well as clinical sexologist at Four Rivers Medical Clinic in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada. My roles include: sexuality education, counseling/therapy, media spokesperson and consultant. I have sat on several non-profit sexuality organizations as well as been a consultant to the World Health Organization/Pan American Health Organization as well as the Public Health Agency of Canada. For more information visit:

American Association of Sexuality Educators Counselors and Therapists, The Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality, The American College of Sexologists, The Canadian AIDS Information Treatment Exchange, The Canadian Professional Association for Transgender Health, The Sexual Health Educator's Network (Manitoba), The International Society for Sexual Medicine.

Malone, R. (2010). "ShoutOut Against Homophobia, Biphobia, Transphobia and Heterosexism." Rainbow Resource Centre. Winnipeg, Canada. Malone, R. et al (2010). "Your Questions Answered. Gender Identity in Schools." Public Health Agency of Canada. Ottawa, Canada.

Undergradate degree in sociology - specialized focus on human sexuality Masters of Public Health (Sexology) Doctorate of Human Sexuality

©2016 All rights reserved.