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Gay Life/Attraction to co-worker


A coworker/friend and i have worked closely together for a tear now. When we first started, our eyes lingered with each other longer than normal. When we passed freight to one another, our hands touched and he kept them there longer than necessary. Ive intentionally let him catch me looking at his body areas and once he made it easier to see when he caught me. We "joke" about gay stuff...i really mean it but say it flippantly vuz im not out. He even says i tease him. Im getting to the point of frustration cuz i really like him. He hss a serious girlfriend tho. How do i know if hes gay or not? Am i projecting my desire of him on uis actions or are they really there and we are both afraid to say anything...... arrrrrggggg. Any insight and direction is MUCH appreciated.

Hi Scott

I have a guiding principle in situations like this... TRUST YOUR INSTINCT!!

There is a reason you are even asking me this question in the first place, and it's because you suspect he shares your interest. Never mind the fact that he has a girlfriend, you are getting a vibe from him and there is a reason. He's flirting with you.

Now, the only question is whether or not he's willing to admit it, or willing to let down the straight guy pretense.
I can't determine if he is or not, but I am fairly confident that he is indeed interested in return.

Best wishes,


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Tedd Adams


I can answer questions related to gay life in general, but also specifically questions about gay youth, coming out, dealing with family issues, religion and homosexuality, and workplace issues. I have also visited many of the popular gay travel destinations and can give you advice on what is worth seeing and what is not.

AVISO: También, puedo responder a preguntas en español.


I have been a volunteer facilitator for a state-sponsored gay youth support group, where we dealt with all of the issues mentioned above. I have also been active in the local chapter of PFLAG.

Human Rights Campaign Oklahomans for Equality Parents, Friends and Families of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG)

Tulsa World, Muskogee Phoenix, Tulsa Family News, About Business Magazine, Contributor to the book "I Can't Believe You Asked That!", by Phillip J. Milano

Associates degree, Biblical Studies, Kentucky Christian College
Bachelors of Science, John Brown University, Psychology
Masters in Organizational Management, University of Phoenix (Tulsa OK campus).

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