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About Azure
Expertise
expertise: over 7000 questions answered...B.A. Psychology Bates College;graduate study, Fordham Univ. School Social Work; technical editor, "dating for dummies", 2d edition, by dr joy browne; thoughtful consideration of your question, then insightful advice about love,romance and related issues given in an objective, non-judgmental manner...over 20 years of personal experience in both short and long term relationships...longer term consultations are available upon request...life experience: personal involvement in many relationships where issues of love, sex, intimacy, trust, etc., had to be dealt with and resolved...just having "experiences", however, isn`t enough...it`s the thoughtful reflection upon and analysis of what happened and why, that leads to learning and enlightenment...so tell me what`s on your mind and i`ll try to help, or tell you if i can`t...thanks
Experience
Over 20 years personal experience in dating, including both short and long-term relationships.Thoughtful reflection and analysis upon same, as well as providing imput relating to issues of love and romance to friends and acquaintances.
BA, Psychology, Bates College, Lewiston, Me. Graduate study at Fordham University School of Social Work.
Life experience can really be the only teacher in this area; however going through the experience is not enough. What is necessary is a real awareness, sensitivity to, and reflection upon what has happened, what has been lost, what has been gained. Getting beyond one's own insecurities and subjectivities, and seeing the experience in the context of the bigger picture, are essential stepping stones to learning and loving.
Education/Credentials
see above..
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You are here: Experts > People/Relationships > Dating > General Dating Questions > Meeting his family
Expert: Azure - 11/3/2009
Question
QUESTION: I have been dating/living together with my Arabian (Jordan)boyfriend and he will not bring me around the family. 5yrs ago he introduced me to them when we first met in SF then he moved to Chicago I followed, we live together but he wont bring me around them, I talk to his sister on the phone, she doesn't understand either. I treat him like a king, I even ask before I go out anywhere he is so respected so loved and I just don't get it. I know his mom was upset his dad passed a long time ago and he said onetime, something about if we had a fight his family would take my side! I told him, if we had a fight your family would never know about it. What do I do. I never loved anyone like this. I am 39 he is 40 he has never been in a relationship either. Please help me
ANSWER: have you asked him about it?
---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------
QUESTION: Yes he thinks if we have a fight they would take my side, I said that in the question. He doesn't like to talk about it so I leave it alone, waiting for ur expert advice! Thank u
Answer
ridiculous answer on his part; it all depends on how big a deal you want to make of this; is it merely a preference, or a dealbreaker? if only a preference, i doubt anything will change; if you choose to REQUIRE that he a) discuss it rationally/considerately, and b)make the familyaccessible, then you need to INFORM him that the current situation, including his refusal to discuss it, is no longer acceptable, and that his cooperation in making the necessary changes is now EXPECTED; without your making this a priority, you're left with quiet acceptance...
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