AboutMurphy Smith Expertise I can answer any general relationship / dating questions.
Experience I used to work as a counselor in a hospital part time for 15 years (16-32 hours a week) and my job was listening to patients who had relationship problems and giving them advice to help them cope with depression, suicidal behavior and thoughts, loss of a relationship or marriage, sexual issues and diseases, unwanted pregnancy, infidelity, abusive relationships, interracial relationships, prostitution, rape, drug addiction, alcohol addiction and abuse etc. I am very inquisitive and ask alot questions on various subjects, which has made me quite knowledgeable in general. I also have read many books on relationships and dating and if I do not know the answer to a question I will research it until I find the correct answer opposed to just pretending that I know about something that I do not. I have also had alot of friends, co-workers and even strangers tell me their problems and expect a sincere and candid answer because I am told that I appear to be a person that can be trusted and I am.
Education/Credentials High school with some college. I have worked for the government for 10 yrs and as part of my job duties I am expected and required to counsel and advice hundreds of employees.
Past/Present Clients I have counseled and advised hundreds of people in the past 25 years on numerous subjects.
Question My girlfriend of 4 years hasn't had sex with me in 2 years.I know she loves me and has never cheated on me, however, she claims she has no sex drive. What do i do? We still love each other and rarely fight.The first 2 years we had sex 2-3 times a week
Answer Steve:
Sex is an important part of many relationships and understandably you are concerned because your girlfriend has not had sex with you in two years. It is good that you rarely fight and that she has never cheated on you however, you have sexual needs and if they are not met you will become frustrated and unhappy, which may already be the case. This can lead to you cheating or at the very least not having your needs met, which can cause other problems in the relationship.
Since you already asked her why she has not had sex with you and she said that she just doesn't have a sex drive I would tell her that you have sexual needs and that you are very frustrated because you want to be intimate with her and ask her if both of you or just herself go and see a doctor and expalin the problem because there could be a physical reason why her sex drive has diminished. If the doctor finds no physical reason for her diminished sex drive then ask to be referred to someone dealing with psychology because there could be a mental reason. I am confident that the problem can be solved but it needs to be addressed.
