General Dating Questions/issues!

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Question
Hey there, So my boyfriend (29) and I (20) are having some problems when it comes to agreeing with something. Him and I met on an online dating website and before I had met him I was on this dating website for about 2 years and within this 2 year time I had met some really cool people and we decided to just keep it a friendship. Before I started dating my boyfriend he was aware that I had friends from an online dating website and didn't mention anything of it.  and now he is having some problems accepting my friendships from the dating website because he thinks their not just looking for friends meanwhile some of them currently have girlfriends and are still talking to myself and willing to go on double dates etc. My friends from this website are willing to meet my boyfriend but he just thinks it's weird. I've been completely open and honest with him, letting him read my texts from these guys etc so I'm not holding anything back and I just feel like hes not trusting me at all and is insecure. I was just wondering what your opinion is on this. Thanks

Answer
Hi Melissa,

In one sense, I can understand where your boyfriend is coming from. You were on a dating website and decided to keep some of those meetings friendships but it didn't start out that way. However, I think you need to keep your boyfriend's mind at ease by explaining why they are just friends and why they didn't work out. Also explain why you're with him and not them. If you have close friendships with these people, you shouldn't need to forfeit them for him and you need to tell him they were there as your friends before him.


The main issue is definitely his insecurities, so be open and honest with him and work on his insecurities by working on his ego with positive reinforcement. Give him compliments and if he does go on these double dates with you, make sure you keep physical contact by holding his hand and showing him affection by showing eye contact from time to time. However, I can see that if any of these guys are around your age, that will go towards his insecurities, so it may be worth reminding him that you like his worldly knowledge/wisdom, as he teaches you things throughout your relationship.

It's not as big of an issue once you talk about it, equally and calmly. Listen to his side and pitch your thoughts to him. Communication is definitely the key.

I wish you all the best.

Karen

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Karen

Expertise

I can answer questions on how to meet people, confidence, what to do for the best dates, problems within relationships, how to interact with your partner and how to end relationships amicably and politely. More specifically, I am best at answering issues pertaining to trust, honesty, openness, fear and communication within relationships. It is important to know that everyone loves differently and we must first identify how a partner (or prospective) partner loves, in order to understand them. I cannot answer questions on whether or not someone sounds like they are interested, people are all different when they like or do not like people. I cannot tell you how someone may react or how a situation will end but merely offer you my advice on the subject.

Experience

I do not have professional experience in the area but my knowledge of psychology, teamed with forever being an agony aunt when it comes to relationships means that I have answered many questions on relationships and am proud to say I have seen quite a few relationships flourish with my advice. I am used to surveying people and guiding them in my daily working life. Due to this, I can read situations very well, often putting a much needed outside perspective to good use.

Education/Credentials
BSc (Hons) Psychology

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