General Dating Questions/My boyfriends online dating profiles
I have been with him a year and a half and everything has been amazing except for this. I'll start by saying two months into our relationship I found out he had an app on his phone called meetme which is pretty much a dating site. When I found out he deleted the app and he said he didn't really use it anymore. But just recently I was using his phone to send an email and in his inbox there was an automatic message from the plenty of fish dating site. He swore he doesn't use it anymore and I was sad because it said he made the profile 9 days before he asked me to be his girlfriend. His profile looked like it hasn't been updated or used in a long time so I took his word for it. Later on I asked him to delete it and he said OH MY GOD I DON'T EVEN USE IT. Then a few days later I asked him again over texts and he said he would delete it. First he said he wasn't sure if it worked, then he said he couldn't log in, so I told him to reset his password and he said he tried it. I know his username so I was able to look on the website to see if he deleted it and then finally it was gone. It should be really simple to delete the profile but he said it took him 30 minutes. His is usually good with computers and his excuses didn't make sense so I feel worried that maybe he was trying to keep it. Should I be worried or should I just be happy that he deleted it?
Thank-you for your question. It is an interesting question indeed because I can see this situation from both sides. After reading your question, I am reminded of a saying someone told me once, ďif you look hard enough for something, youíre going to find it.Ē The reason this came to mind is that it sounds to me like you do not trust your boyfriend for whatever reason and are searching for something to justify the way you feel. Again, this whole thing could be totally innocent or totally sneaky on his part depending on how you want to look at it. I personally went through a bit of this with a past girlfriend when we first met. I was signed up for several free dating websites but forgot all about them upon meeting my girlfriend and dating her. I would get these messages in my inbox that I had no idea who they were from but of course, my girlfriend managed to see these messages and read into them way too much. I felt like no matter what I said to her she didnít believe me. I too had difficulty deleting these profiles but eventually was able to do so. Plus, for me, there was almost a small lack of motivation because I knew I wasnít doing anything wrong, and I really didnít even feel like taking the time to delete them. But I did for her as your boyfriend eventually did for you. Now, Iím not saying with 100% certainty that your boyfriend was not/is not trying to be sneaky here. That is something you have to listen to your gut on. I always tell the people I help that your head and your heart can fool you, but your gut instinct (feeling) remains objective to the situation.
What I would suggest is looking within yourself for the answer to all this. Why donít you trust him? Do you not trust yourself? Were you hurt in a previous relationship where the guy was sneaking around behind your back? Do you not feel worthy enough to be the only woman in his life? These are all question only you can answer for yourself. Thatís what this comes down to for me, respecting yourself. Know how good of a woman you are and stop worrying that he is trying to sneak around on you. If that is indeed the case, the truth will come out eventually without you even having to go look for it.
In short, be happy, donít worry. Follow your gut and enjoy your relationship for the learning lessons it provides you. Please let me know if you have any other questions. Thanks and take care.