General Dating Questions/Communication


Hi Becky,

I am 22 and my boyfriend is 25 we have been together over a year. It was very much love at first sight and I love him very much, there is one issue with our relationship though, communication.

He is not good with keeping in contact at all, I always have to call him and most of the time I just get his voicemail, I always have to text first and half the time won't get a reply. I know how much he loves me and how committed he is to me and our relationship but sometimes I just want to talk to him at an unscheduled time but its near impossible!
I'm having a very hard time at the moment with uni stress and home life problems and he always says if I need someone to talk to I should go to him, but how can I if when I call him the only thing I hear is "Welcome to the O2 messaging service...".

I have asked my friends for advice but all they say is that I should stop contacting him first and leave it to him, but when I do that he worries that I haven't contacted him. I've asked him countless times if i'm too much and if he thinks i'm being clingy but he always says no and that he loves it when I text and call him because it makes him feel loved. He doesn't seem to realize that a text back or just a phone call just to say "I love you" would really make me feel loved in a time where I feel so low.

How do I bring up how concerned I am about his communication?

Thanks Emily


it's time to hear the reality of the situation. This 25-year-old little boy is using you to feel loved and fulfilled, but no where in his mind does he feel like he needs to return this kind of love back. What he is excited about is getting messages and phone calls from his beloved. It's sick, and frankly, it sickens me that your friends are encouraging you to play his game. Stop with the game. Be an adult, because 22-years-old is definitely an adult. You're in university, you're living your life, and here is your immature boyfriend ignoring you, all because he wants to look at his screen and see "well regardless of how my day goes, my girlfriend loves me and she is chasing me".

This is all a mechanism to help him keep his low self-esteem high enough to continue in life.

Hope this helps,


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I can answer almost everything. I am religious person who strongly believes in G-d. If spiritual guidance is also something that you are seeking for, then I am careful and competent in that region. I am also very aware that it's hard to ask for help, with that being said, I am sensitive to others feelings and have gone through hardships in relationships, which demonstrates a quality of empathy and consciousness when it comes to everyday dating situations. I can answer break-up confusions/confusions in dating in general. I can NOT read minds and can answer to the best of my ability in regards to the detail you provide me. With that in consideration, please do not send me pages of information. Pick the most important and effective way to explain the problem and we can make this our problem and our solution together.


I have been in confusing relationships. Most of all I was in a 5 year relationship that really helped me in developing my intellect and sensitivities, which also played a huge role in discovering myself and those around me.

Chai Life Line; deals with special needs children

Bachelor of Arts in English Literature Certified teacher in Canada; recognized internationally

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