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General Dating Questions/Girlfriend jealous because of my future roommate


My girlfriend (Lisa) and I are both 21, straight, and at different colleges (about 3 hours driving distance away).

Next year, a female friend (Sam) and I are planning on getting an apartment together because we think we'd get along well and it would be nice to have a roommate. Trouble is, my girlfriend says that she would probably become jealous of this arrangement if it happens, and I do understand where she's coming from: roommates usually have their own little stories and inside jokes and, well, their own lives together, and my girlfriend would be off in the distance.

If my girlfriend had a male roommate, I could see myself becoming jealous of them; I'm no longer "the" special guy in her life. For some reason, gender seems to matter a lot.

I've been looking forward to sharing an apartment with Sam, but I'd absolutely hate myself if it made my girlfriend feel distanced and not part of my life. What should I do?

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Hey Alex, oh man are you ever between a rock and a hard place. I understand all sides of the situation "You, your girlfriend and the friend", and all opinions/feelings involved are valid. Even though I agree that people get worked up over opposite sex friendships, but in this case it maybe inappropriate to live with your best friend. Even though its platonic relationship its still a boundaries issue.

This is going to cause loads of problems "Drama" in your current relationship. I know you and your girlfriend live are long distance, but you have to ask yourself the question "where is my relationship going, if I am moving in your friend who happens to be a girl?" The very question is whats going on in your girlfriends mind right now "Do we have a future?" What's ultimate outcome in this situation ?

Your friend is still going to be your friend if you guys don't move in together, but you'll potentially lose your girlfriend. Talk to your friend about this scenario, she may be put off at first, even think its silly, but I'm sure she will understand why. Just make sure your friend realizes its not that your tossing her aside and your friendship is important.

Basically what I am getting at is I don't feel its a good idea to move in with your friend. Especially, if you are looking to be with your girlfriend permanently this will change things.  

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Cleopatra Jade


I can answer any question! As a Integrated Master Life coach I help clients overcome personal challenges with my expert advice (Dating, family, self-management, Personal development, stuck emotions, stress, relationships of all kinds, romantic, family or friendships.


Cleopatra Jade is the name traveling and enjoying life to the fullest is my game. -From NY, now living in the fabulous Las Vegas! -Photo blogging, pictures of life and scenery are my thing, so I suppose I don't need to get a hobby! -Intuitive Counselor since 2005- Certified Master Life Coach in 2013, specializing in relationship advice. -Uber & UberEats Brand Influencer/Ambassador, getting the word out about how much of an amazing company Uber is for their outstanding ride services and UberEats food delivery. I'm a candid chick with a zany/ sarcastic sense of humor, who enjoys making people laugh and having a great time- because it's what's needed in this crazy world. In other words, I am all about humor and honesty. I appreciate genuine and people who pull no punches because it lets everyone know where they stand in your life and vice versa. It's how I approach life, business, and the way I work with my clients. I believe that you can be a professional but still be yourself and let your hair down; there's no need to be a stiff shirt, just to give the immpression of being a business person- be authentic. My quote since college: "Why is there a pill for everything else and not the "self's" you know self-awareness, self-righteous, the self-absorb and self-diluted?! Think about it; this would cure most pain in the asses." -Cleopatra



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