General Dating Questions/Mixed Signals?

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Question
QUESTION: Hi There!!
Please help me out on this:
Does it mean anything if a male acquaintance invites himself over to yours for dinner, tells you everything (job, family, friends) about his life (but never about other women), is always eager to see you & talk to you?
But he never calls or texts. He talks to me only when we meet face-to-face.
We started talking a couple of months ago. We live in the same locality and take the same metro to work. He used to mildly flirt with me back then when we were strangers, like he would keep on looking at me, would not divert his eyes even when I caught him looking, try to get me seats, waiting for the metro at the same spot I waited, etc. I thought it was cute that he was flirting in such an innocent, high-school style. So I just went to him & said "Hi". We got talking from there. He is not flirty, but quite talkative & friendly. But sometimes I get mixed signals. Like once we both boarded the same bus, & he bought my ticket also. Once we bumped into each other at the market & he insisted on carrying all my bags. He even invited himself over to dinner at my room once, I like him & was comfortable with him, so I said ok, you can come. After dinner he actually started doing the dishes! He always maintains a respectful physical distance, never tries to touch me. I mean, he is really very sweet & respectful towards me, but I can't deny the fact that our friendship started with flirting, & I was hoping for something more than friendship, though I don't mind being friends with him if that is what he really wants. We are both single (he did ask me this), & he is not shy or anything. But he never calls or texts, we talk only when we meet face to face, & that is always purely by chance. Are we just friends, or is he interested?
(I am a female & we are both in our late 20s)
Thanks for your answer.

ANSWER: Hey There,

Thanks for writing in and dropping a word. It takes a lot to open up about issues in the back of the mind and when its related to our heart, it takes guts to pen down left alone talk with someone about the same. I appreciate your gesture in pouring your heart felt emotions and seeking a helping hand for the same. Kudos to you !!!

Well, I can very well understand your confusion and can step in your shoes to understand what is going on in the back of your mind. Normally, in current scenario there are 2-3 kinds of men, who use different tactics to woo a lady, when they realize she is easy going and situation is such, either stays alone or doesn't have much friends, can be actually taken for ride. Some are quite straight forward with their advances, others would follow normal process of proposal and all stuff. Others are who play smart by trying to act nice, give the girl desired comfort zone, maintain decorum, behave like typical gentleman and when they feel that girl is actually also following in their line, they would behave quite ignorant, so that the girl keeps craving for them and when lady actually confesses she has also fallen, they cna play their own game. I am not saying that guy in question is doing the same, am just highlight practical scenario most ladies face today. In your particular case, when the guy is cutting off all talks when not together is clear indication that he is trying to make you crave and desire to hear from him and tease you to that extent so that you take the first step and anything wrong happens, he can come back saying you approached me, not me. He comes across as a very insecure man, who can be good friend but nothing more and lacks true signs of being genuine lover or future. You need to sit back and recall all his actions and correlate things.

Just go out and give your best and  things would fall in place...

All the best !!

Cheers,
Relationship Counsellor
Bringing smiles on the faces on the way .....

P.S- For more professional help around your subject, you can drop a word at, (relationships.counsellor@gmail.com)

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Thank you so much for your answer. Sir, you are just spot on, it's almost scary!

"When they realize she is easy going and either stays alone or doesn't have much friends"

"give the girl desired comfort zone, maintain decorum, behave like typical gentleman and when they feel that girl is actually also following in their line, they would behave quite ignorant, so that the girl keeps craving for them and when lady actually confesses she has also fallen, they can play their own game."
Yes, I live alone, & have few friends. And ya, he definitely plays the typical gentleman whenever we meet, but would not even reply if I ever SMS. Lol!! How could I not see through his game? I was thinking he is so decent, he is not like other guys who are too forward in their advances! It really irritates me when a guy tries to pursue me, so I was finding this one so sweet and decent, & was definitely beginning to fall for him! Thank you so much for your guidance, I will keep my emotions in control.

Anyway, I am still confused, how would he have behaved if he were really interested? I mean, supposing someone is decent, & does not want to come across as too desperate, respects a woman's space, but is genuinely interested in her, then how would he behave?

Answer
Hey There,

Thanks for reverting and sharing your feedback, appreciate the gesture.I am pleased that I could make out few things correct about you and give you clarity and right direction. Well, it seems scary to you, as you normally tend to ignore things which you already know and I have tried to make you realized the same.

Going by your wordings, you come across as a very strong headed and genuine lady and you don't deserve to be taken for granted. Well, everyone in life needs companionship and staying alone, that too in big city like delhi, it really takes a hard toll on a person. That's the time when we look for someone of our own, but when we realize that people around are just ready to pounce on you and take you for ride, seeing you alone and in search, then we tend to pull ourselves back. You seem to be in some kind of shell, where you hold yourself back, reason being past life experiences, which haven't been really favorable for you. You desire to see life from someone's eyes and have someone, who can read your silence in life, without you even expressing.

Coming to your query, a genuine and honest person, with true feelings, would always talk about a lady's views in life, her desires and motivate her to come out of shell and be free flowing. He won't offer always to be by her side, but would always say to have friends and move out. He more often than not , would be good communicator and would have clarity in thought process, which easily any lady can make out. He would always maintain an arm distance and would be shy of even shaking hands or hug. Would make sure no adult talks happen, would keep in touch even after the day is over and let the lady feel special with small small gestures, not try to woo her with luxuries or big boasting stuff. You just need to sit back and decide your priorities in life and would always be able to differentiate a gentleman from a cheapster.

Just go out and give your best and  things would fall in place...

All the best !!

Cheers,
Relationship Counsellor
Bringing smiles on the faces on the way .....

P.S- For more professional help around your subject, you can drop a word at, (relationships.counsellor@gmail.com)  

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