General Dating Questions/Not sure what to do


Hello Dr Neder

A few months ago, I was with a man on a casual basis and then it ended. We were together for about 6 months. I ended the relationship due to differences in interest with sex. He wanted way too much and I didn't.

At the time it ended, things were said in frustration, but nothing hurtful was said. It was more along the lines of don't contact me, i have nothing to say to you or let me be honest with you.
He also said that he still wanted to be with me if i was more open to him sexually.

We haven't been in contact for about 6 weeks. Then today he sent me a text to say happy lunar new year.

We politely talked about how we were doing.

Can I still contact him and how would be the best way to do this?
Is it wise to contact him again?

I'm not sure what to do now. I must admit, I still think about him every now and then.

Your help would be appreciated



Your parents were sure economical with letters having named you only "T"!

Unfortunately, you haven't told me anything I need to know to help you. If you can fill in the blanks I'll try to give you an answer:

* What has changed in 6 weeks that fixes the original problems? Are you now more sexually open?

* What do you want?

* Are you expecting HIM to change his expectations?

* What are/were his concerns with your sexuality? What issues do you have with your sexuality? What problems do you have about his sexuality?

T - I hope you didn't take this little break just to punish him. If you did, you're starting a downward spiral that you're not going to get out of and it's going to end badly - far worse than how it ended last time.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
CEO/Executive Producer
BAM! Productions
Remington Publications
Producers: "BAM! TV" and “Love and Sex”
Publishers: "Being a Man in a Woman's World I, II & III”

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Dr. Dennis W. Neder


I'm able to answer any sort of question related to the approach, meeting people, dating, sex, relationships, break-ups, non-legal marriage and divorce questions, and anything in between. I've helped over 30,000 people with their individual issues. IMPORTANT: Please, PLEASE don't ask me, "what was he thinking..." or "why did he say..." types of questions! I DO NOT READ MINDS! There are 1,001 reasons why someone does what they do, says what they say or thinks what they think. If you *REALLY* want to know what they were thinking, saying or why they were acting that way - go ask them! Be sure to check out my FAQ's on my website at: You can email me directly at:


I am the author of the books "Being a Man in a Woman`s World I & II" and "1001 Places and Techniques to Meet Great Women" and 11 others. I`ve spent the last 20 years studying the art and science of every aspect of relationships, and have answered over 30,000 letters from readers all over the world. My main focus is men`s relationships with women, but I also have many female readers and answer questions for them regularly as well.

Doctor of Philosophy

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