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General Dating Questions/Why do men (women) like to play games when dating?


Hi Dr Neder

Why do some men like to play pathetic mind games when they talk to women? I'm sure it must happen to men in the dating field.

Sometimes you could have a pleasant conversation, then out of nowhere, the man would twist/manipulate the entire conversation and make you seem like an asshole. It's extremely rude and frustrating. Sometimes you can't help but feel sorry for the person as well.

Is this some sort of dating technique that I am not aware of, or does the person have a lack of communication skills, mental illness or a warped sense of humour?

Is this a sign that the person is playing you?

Thanks for taking the time to read this

Hello again T!

Men don't play games. You only interpret it that way because YOU (women in general) play games.

What you're doing is running events through your own filter trying to make sense of them. Obviously; what else do you have to work with (well, other than me)?

Thus, here's the problem I have with your question: your premise (that men "play games") is the basis for what you're asking me. The premise itself is wrong and thus, I can't answer your question other than to say "no, this isn't a sign that the guy is trying to play you" because men don't do that anyway.

There are a very few, rare exceptions but trust me, you've never seen them - and won't ever likely see them either.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
CEO/Executive Producer
BAM! Productions
Remington Publications
Producers: "BAM! TV" and “Love and Sex”
Publishers: "Being a Man in a Woman's World I, II & III”

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Dr. Dennis W. Neder


I'm able to answer any sort of question related to the approach, meeting people, dating, sex, relationships, break-ups, non-legal marriage and divorce questions, and anything in between. I've helped over 30,000 people with their individual issues. IMPORTANT: Please, PLEASE don't ask me, "what was he thinking..." or "why did he say..." types of questions! I DO NOT READ MINDS! There are 1,001 reasons why someone does what they do, says what they say or thinks what they think. If you *REALLY* want to know what they were thinking, saying or why they were acting that way - go ask them! Be sure to check out my FAQ's on my website at: You can email me directly at:


I am the author of the books "Being a Man in a Woman`s World I & II" and "1001 Places and Techniques to Meet Great Women" and 11 others. I`ve spent the last 20 years studying the art and science of every aspect of relationships, and have answered over 30,000 letters from readers all over the world. My main focus is men`s relationships with women, but I also have many female readers and answer questions for them regularly as well.

Doctor of Philosophy

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