General Dating Questions/Friend's Girlfriend


Hi, I'm Tom and I'm 21 years old. This question is a bit complicated. I'm currently in an engineering college. I was in a relationship with one of my classmates for 6 months and we broke up a few weeks ago. Now, my ex-girlfriend's room-mate has had a crush on me since the beginning and she told me and my ex-girlfriend too. She couldn't do anything because I was in a relationship then. She and my ex used to joke about it too. But now that I've broken up with my girlfriend, I'm interested in her. She now has a boyfriend but she has said that it is just for passing the time, nothing serious. She's also a very attractive girl. How should I approach this matter?

Hi Tommy, thanks for coming to me today.

Engineering is a good degree to have and highly employable here in the states. I'm not sure how well it goes over there though. It kinda depends on what type you do I suppose. Anyway, good luck with it as it can be a tough degree to pursue.

In any case, to your question.

I have never really understood why girls are in a relationship with another person just to "pass the time". This happens, and hilariously it happens often. I think the problem normally comes down to psychological things. Women hate to feel lonely, so they substitute that with men or animals at times. You've heard of cat ladies, right? Still though, the problem while sound, makes no sense at the end of the day. I doubt if a girl is pretty that she needs to go out and find men to fill lonely holes. She needs to be looking for love, or just dating. Not getting in relationships with men just for time passing.

If she wanted to be with you, she's drop clues like saying her relationship isn't serious. She may also touch you as she talks with you or may smile a lot around you. You may even get a hair twist or pull on her end. That said, after all the things you've told me, she's into you. So you can relax a bit. Knowing she likes you makes it easier to ask her out for darn sure.

So, the way to approach it is simple. If you know where to find the chick at, try to meet with her there. Then ask her out on a date. If you don't know, you could always ask your ex. Did you end badly? If not, it is ok to be friends with ex-gfs. You'll have to be at least civil with your ex, because she's your possibly future gf's roommate. All that aside, you should probably ask your ex where one would find her friend during the day. Then go there. Might not be a good idea to ask her out when the other bf is around however.

Hope that helped, good luck!

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Joe Burgett


I can answer anything in the dating world. Whether it be love, sex, break ups, hardships, first dates, you name it. I have been an expert on this site for 2 years in various places, and mainly answer questions for teen dating, but being that I am in the between stage of teen and adult (in my 20s), I understand the new and old on things and no one is too young or too old to ask my help.


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